Humor

Why did the Twin Towers go shopping?

To get some plane bread.

Two balls sit inside a bucket. One turned to another and said, "Hey man, boing, are you sentient, too?"

The other one said, "I’m sapient, you are sentient!"

BOINGZINGA!?!

Once I asked Siri to tell me a joke, and it asked me, "What is the difference between a large pizza and you?" One can feed a family.

A missionary went to visit an orphanage in Thailand. After looking around, he asked the manager, "Why do these kids have numbers instead of names on their shirts? And why are some of them the same?"

The manager smiled and said, "Those are price tags."

What's the most optimistic blood type? B+.

What disease causes wrinkled clothes? An iron deficiency.

Wanna hear two short jokes and one long one?

joke, joke, jooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooke.

Hey, can you tell that a blonde likes you? She only gives you two nights in a row.

How do you call a cute door?

A-door-able.

What do you call a shoe made out of a banana?

A slipper.

I'm not saying you're stupid.

But you're the reason plastic bags come with the warning, "Do not place over head!"

The pterodactyl went in my bathroom and peed.

When I was in the shower, I couldn't hear it. Why? Because the "p" is silent.

What do you call a bee that produces milk? Booby.

Two friends are arguing and one friend says, "Jason Warhis is not afraid of water and not ifs, ands, or buts about it."

And the other friend says, "Butt he is."

My girlfriend broke up with me because she caught me eating a banana with my butt........

IMAGINE!

What did one Geodude say to the other Geodude?

Let’s rock!

Banana!

Q: What does encyclopedia mean by cut them in triple?

A: Encyclopedia, more like "An Cyclone Media!"

Me: Dad, my phone is broken.

Dad: How?

Me: I clicked the home button, but I'm still at school.

Dad: Stupid.

Man, I had a joke, but it left and never came back.

Aloneness is not the joke, it's unfortunately my reality.