Humor
The Earth was flat once. 'Til yo mama got buried.
Yo mama so big, her belt size said "equator."
I shouted at a kid. I told him to get his parents.
It was the last time I worked at an orphanage, 🤣.
What do you call a blond with half a brain? Gifted.
"A N N O Y I N G - D O G - R O B - Y O U R - S A F E."
Blind people driving on the highway would be the world's biggest, and shortest game of bumper cars!
What do you call an Asian that was born too early?
Wong Tai Ming.
What do you call a tall terrorist?
Osama Bin Laden.
Me: Knock knock. Bestie: Who's there? Me: Ben. Bestie: Ben Dover? Me: No, Ben vuyictrbjovtfcybugxrrx. Bestie: Omg how did I forget, hi vuyictrbjovtfcybugxrrx!
My mom was cooking dinner and asked me if I could get her a cutting board.
"No, I need you to take off your shirt and lay on the island so I can cut some chicken."
I used to date this girl only to find out she's a guy.
I guess you can say she had me in a trans.
Is it OK to tell a Covid patient to stay positive?
What did God say when he made the first woman?
"Where is your dick at?"
What’s Forrest Gump’s password? 1forrest1.
Someone complimented my parking today! They left a sweet note on my windshield that said, “Parking fine.”
What does an Asian say when his car tires burst on the highway?
"Some Ting Wheely Wong!"
Why did the telemarketer cross the road?
I don't know.
I don't know either, but I hope there was a car coming.
Why can’t orphans have phones?
Because it has a home button!
What did the Pokémon say after having sex?
"My ball was sore!"
What did the horse say after it tripped?
Help! I’ve fallen and I can’t giddyup!