Humor

Yo mama is so ugly that when she went through a face ID, it didn't think she was human.

Russia—the real joke.

What do you call a group of sped kids with AK-47s?

Special forces.

My first name is Al and my last name is Coholic :) #yuengling.f/wat

Your mama so fat, she walked by a TV and missed eight episodes.

What do you call a white man sandwiched between two black men in a blue sleeping bag?

An Oreo.

"I'm sorry, Wendy, but I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die."

If a blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who would hit the ground first?

The brunette, because the blonde would have to stop and ask for directions!

I have a little John.

My biggest joke: I’d show you, but I don’t have a mirror to show you.

Did you hear about the cannibal who converted to Catholicism?

On Fridays, he only eats fishermen!

What did The Notorious B.I.G. say to the cow?

- MOO MONEY MOO PROBLEMS

What’s the name of the band in the gay bar?

A: Beers for Queers.

What's the biggest problem with gravity?

It keeps putting people down.

It was so cold out today believe it or not, I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets!

"My dick fell off in the shower!" suddenly a bright flash of white lights. You see God smiling at you. "Joseph, where is your wiener, little one?" He says, chuckling lightly.

"Discuss the synopsis of this poem: My Friend Billy Has A Ten-Foot Willy."

Thanks to an unfortunate typo, it's the most one-sided action movie ever.

Alen vs. Predator.

What does the cross guard say to the cows crossing the road?

Mooooooooooo along!

Husband: Hey honey, words can’t describe how beautiful you are.

Wife: Aww, thanks.

Husband: But numbers can. 0 out of 10.