Humor

Why is it hard to break up with a Japanese girl?

Because you have to drop the bomb twice for her to get it.

What do you call a toy that has a story?

Toy Story.

What's the biggest joke ever? Gender equality.

Guys, stop making jokes about blind people, they might s... never mind, continue.

What is the difference between a woman and my fridge?

Only one moans when I put my meat in it.

Have you played the game Imagine Dragons? Imagine draggin' deez nuts!

Did you hear they made an Emo-Hipster pizza?

It cuts itself, and you're supposed to eat it before it's cool.

Don't say your life is a joke, because jokes got meaning.

What is a leaf mixed with mud called? Ligma.

Ligma balls!

None of these are jokes... they're all facts!

What's the same about a newborn and a football?

You can kick them both very easily.

I have a better method of abortion than currently used. It's like a regular one, except you can get free food out of it... We're about to give baby-back ribs a whole new meaning.

I thought God didn't make mistakes, but then I saw your face.

My late grandpa was always popular with women. One day, before he died, I asked him what his secret was. He said, "I inherited a watering hole."

Bewildered, I replied, "What does that have to do with anything?"

"I could easily get anyone wet because I was well endowed."

A guy tried to suffocate himself with his BMW exhaust, but his engine failed.

This is the first time German engineering fails to gas someone.

Your mom said, "Can you get to the dick game?"

🗣: "Stop making suicide jokes!"

"Don't worry bro, I'll end it soon."

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?

Depends on how hard you throw them.

What's an Asian's favorite food place?

Answer: Petco

Elmo in 2022 is called "Tickle My Balls Elmo."