Humor
Knock knock...
Who's there?
Not Stephen Hawking.
Q: What did the skeleton say when he proposed to his girlfriend?
A: Will you marrow me?
Do you have a shovel in your back pocket?
Why?
'Cause I’m digging that ass.
You're so fat, no one was laughing, but the floor was cracking!
Why did the hedgehog cross the road?
To get to the other side (suicide).
Why did the second hedgehog cross the road?
To see his flatmate.
Memes
That's all is needed to complete my day
What do you do when you hear your wife squirming around in the back yard?
Reload... chhchhhh.
What do you call a man with a curly toe?
Carlito.
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Cakatoo."
"Cakatoo who?"
"So, you're a Rooster now?"
Why did Sally cross the road?
She didn’t wear her seatbelt.
Did you know that graveyards are the most popular place in the world?
Yeah, people are just DYING to get in there...
What would be a good job for a fat person? A four-chin teller!
The people at 9/11 must have been able to read fast. If I explain it, it won't be funny. This is an old joke my friend told me.
What did one butt cheek say to the other?
"Together we can stop this shit!"
Three nuns are having a charity in front of the church.
A man in a trench coat walks up and flashes the three nuns. The first nun had a stroke, the second nun had a stroke, but the third nun, her arm was too short.
Okay not a depression joke but... what’s worse than 10 babies in 1 bucket?
1 baby in 10 buckets.
What did the pilots say before crashing into the Twin Towers?
"We can't go over it, we can't go under it, we go through it!"
Guys, stop telling orphan jokes, soon they're gonna tell they're par... oh wait, never mind, carry on.
Have you heard of Imagine Dragons (the band)? Imagine dragging these nuts across your face.
I didn't get the joke at first, then it hit me like a plane.
TommyInnit is a joke.