Humor
I had a friend named Mari. Sadly, she did drugs.
So one day I go up to her and say, “Mari-juana do this???” She later asked me to leave forever... I don’t gnome why, but... it CRACKed me up a bit!!!
What do you call a funny family of chairs? A sitcom!
I apologise for this joke lmfaooo, and you have probably heard this banger before, anyways;
What is the difference between a priest and a zit? 👀 The zit waits till you are 13 to come on your face 🤧
All of you guys in this orphanage are ABCDEFGHIJK.
What's that? said the orphans.
Attractive, brilliant, cute, darling, elegant, funny, gorgeous, and hot.
What's the IJK?
I'm just kidding! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Knock knock...
Who's there?
Not Stephen Hawking.
Memes
Q: What did the skeleton say when he proposed to his girlfriend?
A: Will you marrow me?
Do you have a shovel in your back pocket?
Why?
'Cause I’m digging that ass.
You're so fat, no one was laughing, but the floor was cracking!
Why did the hedgehog cross the road?
To get to the other side (suicide).
Why did the second hedgehog cross the road?
To see his flatmate.
What do you do when you hear your wife squirming around in the back yard?
Reload... chhchhhh.
What do you call a man with a curly toe?
Carlito.
Somebody stole my joke.
So I stole their spinal cord.
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Cakatoo."
"Cakatoo who?"
"So, you're a Rooster now?"
Why did Sally cross the road?
She didn’t wear her seatbelt.
Did you know that graveyards are the most popular place in the world?
Yeah, people are just DYING to get in there...
What would be a good job for a fat person? A four-chin teller!
The people at 9/11 must have been able to read fast. If I explain it, it won't be funny. This is an old joke my friend told me.
What did one butt cheek say to the other?
"Together we can stop this shit!"
Three nuns are having a charity in front of the church.
A man in a trench coat walks up and flashes the three nuns. The first nun had a stroke, the second nun had a stroke, but the third nun, her arm was too short.
Okay not a depression joke but... what’s worse than 10 babies in 1 bucket?
1 baby in 10 buckets.