Humor

I had a friend named Mari. Sadly, she did drugs.

So one day I go up to her and say, “Mari-juana do this???” She later asked me to leave forever... I don’t gnome why, but... it CRACKed me up a bit!!!

What do you call a funny family of chairs? A sitcom!

I apologise for this joke lmfaooo, and you have probably heard this banger before, anyways;

What is the difference between a priest and a zit? 👀 The zit waits till you are 13 to come on your face 🤧

All of you guys in this orphanage are ABCDEFGHIJK.

What's that? said the orphans.

Attractive, brilliant, cute, darling, elegant, funny, gorgeous, and hot.

What's the IJK?

I'm just kidding! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

What's the difference between a baby and a mansion?

I've never seen the inside of a mansion.

Q: What did the skeleton say when he proposed to his girlfriend?

A: Will you marrow me?

Knock knock...

Who's there?

Not Stephen Hawking.

What do you call a man with a curly toe?

Carlito.

What do you do when you hear your wife squirming around in the back yard?

Reload... chhchhhh.

You're so fat, no one was laughing, but the floor was cracking!

Somebody stole my joke.

So I stole their spinal cord.

Do you have a shovel in your back pocket?

Why?

'Cause I’m digging that ass.

Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating?

Because they have no body to go with.

When it's April Fool's Day, go to an orphan and say, "Their parents should come back!"

How many homeless guys does it take to change a lightbulb?

“You’re telling me there’s change in a lightbulb?”

Q. There were two sisters. One was having twins and asked her sister to help name the children. If one was named Deniece, what was the other named?

A. Denephew.

Did you know that graveyards are the most popular place in the world?

Yeah, people are just DYING to get in there...

I didn't get the joke at first, then it hit me like a plane.

Guys, stop telling orphan jokes, soon they're gonna tell they're par... oh wait, never mind, carry on.

What did the pilots say before crashing into the Twin Towers?

"We can't go over it, we can't go under it, we go through it!"