Humor
The quiet kid's dad dies. You go, "Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
"Not your dad."
Then he says, "What comes after 47?"
The quiet kid says, "AK."
Why did I giggle?
Because I saw the ocean's bottom.
I think people should date orphans, because their parents are never home.
Your forehead is so big that it was used as a billboard.
What’s the name of the band in the gay bar?
A: Beers for Queers.
Your mama so fat, she walked by a TV and missed eight episodes.
What does the cross guard say to the cows crossing the road?
Mooooooooooo along!
Why did the cowboy put his bunk in the fireplace?
'Cause he wanted to sleep like a log!
It was so cold out today believe it or not, I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets!
"Discuss the synopsis of this poem: My Friend Billy Has A Ten-Foot Willy."
Thanks to an unfortunate typo, it's the most one-sided action movie ever.
Alen vs. Predator.
"My dick fell off in the shower!" suddenly a bright flash of white lights. You see God smiling at you. "Joseph, where is your wiener, little one?" He says, chuckling lightly.
What's the biggest problem with gravity?
It keeps putting people down.
Q. What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A. A gummy bear.
Q. What monster plays the most April Fools' pranks?
A. Prankenstein.
What happened when the teacher tied all the students' shoe laces together?
They took a class trip.
Why can't bugs drive... because they don't have a LICE-ens...
BA-DUM CHHH!
I just stepped on a corn flake. I'm officially a cereal killer.
Famous last words: I COULD EAT THIS IN ONE BITE!
Why was the turtle looking at her phone?
She wanted to take a shellfie.