Humor

What’s white and crunchy and swings through trees?

A meringue-atang.

Looks like someone's funny bone's broken!

At night in the Nunnery, one Nun says to the other Nun, "Where's the candle?" The other Nun says, "Doesn't it!"

Mom: See that guy over there with no hands, tell him to clap.

Son: Mom, I'm blind.

Mom: Exactly!

Fortnite is good.

(Awesome joke, right?)

One day, I saw a kid sitting on the curb dressed in rags. I asked if he was an orphan. He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?" I said, "His parents."

Titanic jokes sink in. Pun intended.

How did the skeleton know it was gonna rain?

If you said he felt it in his bones, you're wrong. He watched the weather forecast.

What is a redneck's favorite sock?

A red sock.

I want to thank all the sidewalks out there for keeping me off the street.

My dad and I were talking and my cat left the room.

So I said, "I guess she wasn't feline it."

My dad said, "You've got to be kitten me, that was purrfect!"

I said, "Literally."

Highest level of insult by a girl by seeing a guy's dick:

"I can shit bigger logs than that thing of your's" 🤣

PP almighty stabeth thy! Then my sister said, "Just put it in."

A pun enters the room and kills ten people.

Pun in, ten dead.

What did the Indian cheese say to the other cheese?

"Tu cheese badi hai mast mast!"

You thought his puns were bad, wait till you sea mine!

The joke is this website.

My wife is an optimist. Our first night together, she handed me a Magnum XL condom. I didn’t know what to do, so I made her a balloon animal 🎈🦒.

what do you get when you play a country song backwards? you get your wife, your house, and your kids back.

I could tell you the one about the broken pencil... but it's pointless.