Humor
Virgos are always virgins to age 17... Just saying.
So this blind man was walking down the street with his stick, right? And he walked past this fish market, he took a deep breath and said, "WWOAAH GOODMORNING LADIES!"
Her (DYM 88).
My therapist said: "Time heals all wounds."
I shot her, now we wait.
What do you call onions and beans?
Tear gas.
What do you call a monkey in a mine field?
BaBOOM!
What is a paedo's favourite time of year?
Halloween because they get free delivery.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Mama.
Big Mama. Big Mama can't fit through the door.
My grandpa unplugged the AC, so I unplugged his life support.
Q: What do you call a chip that goes fast?
A: A rocket chip.
I tried to write the shortest joke ever, so I wrote a two-word joke, which was "Dwarf Shortage." It's just so I could pack more jokes into the show.
What happens when you kick a boy in the balls?
THEY NUTS ARE IN PAIN.
Why did the emo step in front of a car? To get to the other side.
I hear you like funny people. In fact, my whole life's a joke!
What do you call a boomerang that does not come back?
An orphan's parents.
How do you talk to giants? Using big words.
I tried to pull (his/her) leg at the comedy club, but got arrested for sexual harassment. Does that still count as a joke? 🤣
So I didn't want my mom going through my laptop, so I put a touch screen on it where you just have to tap the screen to unlock it. Jokes on her, she doesn't have any fingers.
What do you call an Indian gymnast? Balance Singh.
A Mario & Luigi joke.
What are the Mario bros' view on child support?
Mario: The parents are obligated to provide for the child and help them the best they could.
Luigi: LMAO I GOTTA GO!