History jokes
What do u call an Asian that was born at the wrong time?
Wrong тайминг.
Queen Elizabeth came back before your dad did.
You telling me Julius Caesar, who has been dead for well over 50 years, made this salad?
What do you call a blind German shepherd?
A Nazi.
So, if Russia was the motherland and Germany was the fatherland, what does that mean?
The Western Front is domestic violence.
Memes
Why was Helen Keller slurring her fingers?
She was drunk.
What’s the only positive thing about Freddie Mercury’s death?
The HIV test results.
Who would win in a fight, in a boxing ring? Mike Tyson or Helen Keller with a Tommy gun?
Mike Tyson. Helen Keller never heard the bell.
Tons of people committed suicide on 9/11 by destroying government property.
Not to mention and by plane.
What did the captured Germans say to the French in WW1?
"Verdun for."
You must be from Pearl Harbor, 'cause baby, you're the bomb!
What is the difference between Usain Bolt and Hitler?
Usain Bolt can finish a race.
They say there is strength in numbers. Tell that to the people in the World Trade Center.
What is George Floyd’s best pick up line?
"You're breathtaking."
What do you call a dog turd in China?
Waste of food.
Who were the greenest Presidents in US history? The Bushes.
Why can’t Americans play chess?
They lost 2 towers.
It was women driving the planes for 9/11.
Why are people acting like Kamala Harris is the first woman to obtain such a high-ranking position in the US government?
Have we all forgotten that Monica Lewinsky was directly under Bill Clinton?
For centuries the Catholic Church censored everything that wouldn‘t fit with their teachings. You know what I call that?
"Chancel culture!"