History jokes
"John FK, he think he special car no top, everyone see like he on parade. Me, I stay hidden, secret style, no bullets find me. Much smar smarter, no? Scret lifestyle safety."
What do Marie Antoinette and 2005-2012 Korn have in common?
They're both Headless.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?
'Cause she didn't wear a seatbelt.
Why were the Twin Towers mad?
Because they ordered pepperoni pizza, but all they got was plain!
Which legendary Dutch wanderer slept for twenty years, except when he got up to pee?
Rip Van Tinkle.
when she says its her first time by u feel the presence of the past dihs inside her
What do you call a prehistoric crow? Crow-Magnon.
"Bippity Boppity Boop! Bill Cosby's coming for you!"
Q: Who are the fastest readers in the world?
A: 9/11 victims. They went through 89 stories in 7 seconds.
You could say ancient Egyptians and JDM car fans are alike--they both worship Datsun.
What do royals and hot dogs have in common?
They're usually in bread.
Jokes about communism aren't funny unless everyone gets it.
What did the Twin Towers say when they saw the airplane?
Batter up!
How was the Roman Empire cut in half? With Caesar!
Why was the North Tower a bad doctor when the South Tower collapsed?
Because the North Tower didn’t do CPR.
The north and south towers got into an argument.
The south tower said, "We will talk about this when we are on the ground."
My father was a great pilot. He died on 9/11.
Why were there only 3,000 Mexicans at the Battle of the Alamo?
'Cause they only had 4 trucks.
What war did the black community win?
The Obama era. Only to lose to a smarter white person.
Pilot: So Kobe, it seems like you’re not going to make it to your destination in time, so I’m going to put it on autopilot so I can find a place to fill with gas.
Kobe: Take us to the side of that mountain at full speed. I don’t really want to go to the event anymore.
I saw two really tall guys. I walked up and said, "I didn't know we still have the Twin Towers!"