History jokes
What do Drew Bledsoe and the Twin Towers have in common?
They both got taken out by two jets.
Your hairline goes so far back that it was getting whipped in the 1800s.
What does Santa Claus and Bill Cosby have in common?
They both come while you’re asleep.
A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a Martinus.
"Don't you mean a martini?" asks the bartender.
The Roman replies, "If I wanted a double, I would have asked for one!"
Bill Clinton, George W. Bush, and George Washington are on a sinking ship.
As the boat sinks, George Washington heroically shouts: “Save the women!”
George W. Bush hysterically hollers: “Screw the women!”
Bill Clinton asks excitedly: “Do we have time?”
What’s the difference between Usain Bolt and Hitler?
Usain finished the races.
Nah, I'm Hawaiian but I'm also Japanese. So does that mean I bombed my own harbor?
I could have sworn while watching anime I saw an American Boeing B-29 Superfortress in the background dropping bombs!
"We can't go over it, we can't go under it. Oh no, we'll have to go through it!"
Jeffrey Dahmer was craving 5 Guys before it was a restaurant.
My dad died in 9/11, he was a great pilot.
Why did Hitler never go to a strip club?
Because he hated the Poles!
What do you call a dead black plantation worker? Fertilizer.
What do the Twin Towers and your siblings have in common?
Once they turn 18, they never come back.
Yo mom's so old, she went into the museum and walked out with a raise.
What did the passengers of the plane say when they saw the airplane strip? Nothing, because it was not an airplane strip, but a tower.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?
'Cause she didn't wear a seatbelt.
What do Marie Antoinette and 2005-2012 Korn have in common?
They're both Headless.
Why were the Twin Towers mad?
Because they ordered pepperoni pizza, but all they got was plain!
Jokes about communism aren't funny unless everyone gets it.