Her jokes

Yo mama so fat, when she falls, they have to call 999 and a crane to pick her up.

Your mama is so fat, even God couldn't raise her spirit.

My wife told me she was fat and depressed. She asked me to compliment her, so I said, "You have perfect eyesight!"

Nana when Zane kisses her in her mind: [Insert Chiwawa Scream!]

There was a girl called Millie, and she had sexy blond hair, and she wanted to chase me, but I told her she had to catch me first if she loves me.

Wayne Couzens, the police officer who killed Sarah Everard, has been complaining about receiving a whole life tariff for her murder...

I think he should count his blessings. He could have had it worse...

He could have married her!

She said she was cheating. I put anti-freeze in her drink.

How do you know if your sister's on her period?

Your dad's dick tastes funny.

What's worse than fingering your sister?

Finding your dad's wedding ring inside her.

Why were her hands purple?

She heard it through the grapevine.

How to harass? Say it out loud but slowly. Split that word into, and it sounds like "her ass."

"Your mum has very small balls. Congrats! I told her, your balls are bigger than your husband's."

I got fired from my job at the bank today.

An old lady came in and asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

Yo mama so ugly, her mirror broke.

Your mum's so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing.

Your sister is so stupid, she only thinks an onion will make people cry.

So I threw a coconut at her.

My ex was an orphan as a child.

I should have taken that as the first sign.

If her parents didn’t want her, why would I?

I went to a tall girl and I asked her, "What do you do for a living?" She says, "An account." So I reply with, "An accounting the hairs on people's heads," and then I run away.

Yo mama is so ugly, her self-portraits hanged themselves.

I told my wife to embrace her mistakes.

So she gave me a hug.

Yo mama so fat, even Dora couldn't explore her.