Her jokes

Him: Hey girl, do you have pet insurance?

Her: Yes, why do you ask?

Him: Cuz I'm going to bang that pussy up!

Yo momma so slutty, when she got a throat swab, the lab found eight different types of semen on her tonsils.

Yo momma so dumb, the doctor wanted to give her a blood transfusion but she said no because she thought it would turn her trans.

Why are modern women trash?

Because back in the day a woman knew her place.

The next woman who says she'd rather be alone in the woods with a bear, I'm throwing her in a pit with a bear and making her fight it with a wooden sword while drinking and singing "The Bear and the Maiden Fair."

What’s the benefit of dating a homeless woman?

You can drop her off anywhere.

Dschoha's wife was accustomed to go out at night to meet her lover, which caused the neighbors to tease Dschoha. Thus, one night he stayed awake until she left, then locked the door and sat down just inside.

Upon returning, she found the door locked. She asked him to have mercy on her and to open the door, but he just scolded her.

Having given up hope for a good outcome, she said to him, "If you don't open the door for me, I'll jump into the well."

Then she picked up a large stone and threw it into the well. Filled with regret, he ran outside to see what had happened. His wife immediately slipped into the house and locked the door.

He made every effort to convince her to let him come inside, but she scolded him incessantly, saying, "This is what you get for staying out all night with your drunken friends!" And thus she succeeded in shaming him in the presence of all their neighbors.

I had a girlfriend who was a below-the-knee amputee. We broke up because she just couldn't keep her legs closed.

When Sally was little, she came home from school and said to her mother, "Mom, I can't believe it! Little John collects Pimmel at school."

Mom: "No?"

"Like in heaven?" said the mother.

"No, juice," Sally said.

In the French school, four sentences must be written. Fritz heard his mother say, "Close the door!"

Fritz went to his uncle and heard, "Yes, I'll put it there."

Then he came to his brother who said, "They call me Superman, hahaha!"

Finally, his sister looked at a photo and said, "Wow!"

The next day, the teacher said, "Okay, Fritz, it's your turn. Finish eating and take out the trash!" Fritz said, "Close the door!"

The teacher got angry and said, "I want to see the principal." Fritz replied, "Yes, my friend, I am leaving you."

The teacher asked, "I have forgotten your name, what is it?" Fritz said, "I'm Superman! I'm Superman! You're nothing!"

"Who do you think I am?" asked the teacher, who had become very angry. Fritz replied, "Wow!"

A man walks into a restaurant. The waitress hands him a menu and it says: "Hot dog: $2, Hamburger: $5, Blowjob: $10."

He asks the waitress, "Are you the one who gives the hand jobs?"

She says, "Yes, I am."

He tells her, "Good. Can you go wash your goddamn hands? Because I want a hot dog."

Fritz Cheng was asked to write three articles on the subject. He went to his grandmother and advised her: "Question: Kill people! I am sorry, Mr. Fritz, I am looking for his brother—what do you suggest?"

Brother: "I'm Superman. I am Superman!"

Fritz remembers entering the room. That's Alfredo's question in front of the TV: "Do you have any advice?"

Fritz tells a story from his school days. "Remember our words?" said Professor Fleck. "An artist? Is that true? Frison, who are you?"

"I am Superman. I'm Superman," he said. "I hope to meet the president."

Your mama's so fat, she needed NASA to make her ID card!

How do you piss off a feminist? You rape her.

My girlfriend accuse me of cheating. I asked her what was I supposed to do? She was just lying naked she said just do the damn autopsy.

What did Britney Spears’s left leg say to her right leg? Nothing they’ve never met

My therapist said, "Time heals all wounds," so I cut her.

Yo Mama is so fat that Nationwide took nine years to get on her side.

If your wife has boxes and boxes ending up at your front door from her online shopping habit, tell her that you’ve only had one box through the marriage and that she should be happy.

How do you know your sister’s on her period? Your sisters pussy taste funny