Health jokes
Once upon a time lived a fat ass named Steve and got rabies and died. The end!
Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn't last as long for fat people.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
A.
A who?
A-bless you!
Why are quadriplegics so unsympathetic? Because they only have feeling in 10% of their body.
One day in my class, we were having that good snack, and one of my classmates choked on a Cheerio. One small, single, Cheerio!
Why'd Sally drop her ice cream?
She was hit by a bus.
What do you get after a leper has a hot bath? ... Porridge.
What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?
The wheelchair.
What's the difference between Cain Dashiell and Down syndrome?
Nothing.
Old man goes to the doctor.
The doctor says, "The test results are back, and I'm sad to say you have cancer and Alzheimer's."
The old man says, "Phew! At least it's not cancer!"
Why do people shake cigarette boxes?
To wake up the cancer.
There was a man in a wheelchair, and he got knocked out in front of a bus. He had a wheelie good life!
Why can't the blind man see? Because he can't see.
What's the hardest part of a vegetable?
The wheelchair.
Yo mama so fat, when she goes to the movies, she sneaks candy in her fat rolls.
Yo mama is so fat that you should really take care of her because diabetes is a serious problem and she might die.
What do you call a person whose heart stopped?
Dead.
I told my doctor I was experiencing some back pain. He told me to smoke some weed because I had chronic back pain.
Mikey don't clean his foreskin dude straight gay.
Yo mama so fat that she should be worried for her health and go see a doctor.