Guy jokes
What do you call a guy that lies a lot?
The president.
Some guy: making a sandwich.
Me: *rages* to put the ham in!
Guy with no arms: Even if I don’t have arms, I can do everything you can do.
🎵if you’re happy and you know it clap your hands🎵
My guy: I have a Q-Tip.
Me: You can Q my tip.
My guy: Ayo!
What's meaner than a pit bull with AIDS?
The guy that gave it to him.
Me when my girlfriend comes home, I check her phone and there are 100 texts from a different guy asking her out, and her text says yes.
Get the whip, you're out!
Guy and Girl are in the shower talking to each other.
Guy: Let's drop the soap.
Girl: Let's do it!
Why the fuck is this guy calling me a crying bitch?
Did you hear about the Syrian guy that shot a bunch of people? He was Robert Kurd.
Guys, what should I be for Halloween (aka tomorrow)?
Guys, should I do it? You know what I mean.
Why could you not see the guy in my dark closet?
The guy was black.
I put a guy in a fridge. He said, "I had a nightmare!"
Did you hear about that one guy who dipped his balls in paint?
My friend said they were “Pretty nuts!”
These two guys were texting each other.
Guy 1: How are you?
Guy 2: I’m great. The weather is lovely here. Guy 2: *sends picture of a flying spring*
Guy 1: ???
Guy 2: Springs in the air. :)
Ayo fake guy.
Two people stood in one room. The first guy stared at the second.
First guy: “Sorry I had to punch you. It was a game, bro.”
Second guy: “Between me and you talking, there’s almost no PUNCH line. Hah!”
You guys know BeReal?
BeReal? More like cereal.
Get it? BeReal = cereal.
A big guy told the small guy, "Do you want a little pill because you look ill, or should I smash you?"
Hey guys! I'm back! Sorry I didn't post yesterday! I had swim practice, and a bunch of homework, but here I am! And here is the quote of the day!
"Push yourself, because no one will do it for you."
Love y'all so much!