Girlfriend Jokes

I like my dynamite like I like my woman. Hot and ready to explode.

I hooked up with my German girlfriend, but I kept on getting distracted when she kept yelling her age

I suggested to my girlfriend that she would look sexier with her hair back Apparently that’s insensitive to someone during chemo

What did the autistic kid say to his girlfriend after they broke up? I thought what all we had was special

When I have sex, my girlfriend screams, especially when I walk in on her

My girlfriend got covid

This is the perfect time to propose to her. She might just say yes because of the lack of taste.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Me when people ask how old my Girlfriends are: There 2 their 4 their 6 their 8.

My girlfriend told me she’s sad because she’s put on a bit of weight I told her to keep her chins up

How do you really piss off your girlfriend while having sex?

Call her on the phone.

What does a canabolist do after he dumps his girlfriend??

He wipes his butt

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

911 whats your emergency? Me: Officer My Girlfriend is dead! Operator: What Happened!? Me: She Bit The Tip

My girlfriend said she wanted to be pampered. I told her I wasn't into diaper fetishes.

What’s the difference between a loser and a paper? A girl actually dates the paper.

When do you go on red and stop at green A watermelon

My girlfriend broke up with me because I stole her wheelchair.

But I knew she’d come crawling back to me.

I was hiking once with my girlfriend. Suddenly a huge brown bear was charging at us, really mad. We must have come close to her cubs. Luckily I had my 9mm pistol with me. One shot to my girlfriend's kneecap was all it took. I could walk away at a comfortable pace.