Get jokes
Why does a golfer wear two pairs of pants?
In case he gets a hole in one!
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple always gets picked. ππππππ
What does the sign say on the hooker house after they were on lockdown?
Answer: "We're on lockdown, get lost pervert."
So there was this girl and her horse would not stop following her, so she said, "Stop horsing around!"
Get it? "Horse-ing."
I know why nobody likes my comments, because they got no sense of humor. That's why they dislike it. Now I know depression is a joke, a joke that never gets a laugh. =[ WHYYYY NO ONE LAUGH AT MY JOKES?
Memes
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
One gets picked.
Spongebob: Easy now, you try first. Get a jar.
Patrick: *picks up nuke*
Spongebob: Patrick, that's a nuke!
Patrick: Yes.
Nuke: *boom*
Why did the Russian cross the road?
To get to the other side.
HOLY CRAP!!!
Crap with holes in it.
Get it? HOLE - Y?
What did the people who cracked the Liberty Bell get for breaking it?
The no-bell prize.
Why didn't Steven Hawkins get into fights?
'Cause he couldn't stand up for himself.
Why did the camel cross the road?
Because it wanted to get to the bright green grass.
Why does the sun get a lot of girls? Because it's hot.
What time is it when you get home and you can't walk?
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they will never get home.
What do an acting role and playing sports have in common?
If you break a leg, you get cast.
A man walks into a forest and sees a girl crying. He asks her, "What is wrong?"
She replies, "I lost my family, my friends, and my home."
The man then unties his pants and says, "Then young lady, your day is about to get worse!"
Why did the guy get the hose?
Because the girl was smoking hot.
When your wife gets pregnant and you don't want a kid, just come on down to Momma Mia's Pizzeria and abortion clinic!
Two rabbits were racing. Neither could get ahead, so they ended in a hare-tie!