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One day, Little Johnny needs to use the bathroom. His mom is in there, so he went in to use it and asked his mom, "What is that between your legs?"

His mom told him that is her bush. Then the next day the same thing happened, but with his dad. He asked his dad, "What is that between his legs?" He said, "My snake."

The same thing happened one more time, except with his grandmother. Little Johnny asked grandma what is on her chest. She said, "My headlights."

One night, Little Johnny caught his parents doing something naughty. Then he said, "Grandma, grandma, turn on your headlights! Daddy's snake is trying to get into mommy's bush!"

I was going home and 3 guys came up to me: an Italian, a Black guy, and a Spanish guy. They said, "You should be a proud brother, your sister knows her meats." I didn't know what they were talking about. They said, "Your sister won a trophy, you will see it when you get home." I went home. My sister said, "Look, I won a trophy by knowing my meats." I said, "What do you mean?" She said, "Well, 3 guys blindfolded me and I gave them a blowjob, each one of them, and I guessed which flavor it was. I was right all the time, that's how I won my trophy." As a big brother, I couldn't be any prouder.

What do you get when the queen farts a noble gas?

What do you get when a dino farts? A blast from the past.

Why are ninja farts so dangerous? They are silent but deadly.

What does dark humor and a child with cancer have in common?

That I will never get old.

Why did the chicken cross to the U.S. from Mexico?

To get to the U.S., but he had to show his papers first.

Why did the disabled chicken cross the road?

To get its wheelchair!

China servers are up on Fortnite, yeah, check by there.

"China getting this dick in your mouth 😂"

What did the boy with no hands get for his birthday?

Gloves!

JK, he hasn't opened it yet.

When Sara gets naked in the shower, she turns her taps on :)

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence?

Time to get a new fence!

Why did Stephen Hawking die?

He tried to get the free cracked version of Windows 10.

What do you get when you cross a Muslim in a trench coat and a duffel bag?

A sad news story.

Yo mama so fat, that when she gets in a monster truck, it becomes a low-rider!

Why did the mermaid want to go to the evil monster so it could get a real joke? Ha, ah, ah, ha!

Flat girls be like, "I will have breasts in the future." This is to all the flat girls: you will never get it.

Why is an orphan's least favorite day field trip day?

Because they can't get a parent's signature.

What do you say when your pet pig gets lost?

This is a pig problem!

What can orphans not get when playing a sport?

A home run!

Why do orphans like playing tennis so much?

Because it’s the only way they’ll ever get love.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house.

Ok, wanna hear another one? Okay. Knock knock. (Who's there?) The chicken from the other joke.