Get jokes

What's the opposite of Christopher Reeve?

Christopher Walken.

Those t.p. jokes are getting shittier by the second.

What happens when a strawberry gets run over crossing the street? Traffic jam.

Why do orphans love playing tennis?

Because it’s the only love they get.

What’s the difference between rape and marriage?

With marriage, you get to keep the screaming woman.

What do you get if you cross a loaf of bread with a vagina?

A yeast infection.

Q: What’s the worst thing about breaking up with a Japanese girl?

A: You have to drop the bomb twice before she gets the message.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get hit by a bus.

What did the woman say when I told a rape joke?

"I don't get it."

How do you get a nun pregnant?

Fuck her hahaha 🤣

If you are dehydrated, you should get well soon.

If your boyfriend doesn't get your fruit puns, you got to let that mango.

Why do orphans go to church?

Because it's the only place where they get to call him "father."

I have a joke about death.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get to the other side.

Think about it :)

Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens?

They were always saying "Bach, Bach, Bach". And his cows preferred Moo-zak.

Why did Oliver have no friends?

His last name was Clothesoff, and all the other kids would get in trouble whenever they would ask to play with Oliver Clothesoff.

What's the difference between a white woman and a tornado siren?

The tornado siren doesn't get raped.

Why do orphans that go to their friend's house get this reaction from the friend's mom:

"Go back to your house, it's late." "Finn, wait, can I have your mom's phone number?" "Finn, wait, aren't you an orphan?" "Wait, don't you have a phone, Finn?" "Wait, I forgot, you don't have a phone because nobody wanted to get you a phone or to get you."

A fly is 6 inches above water, and a fish sees it and it leaps out and gets the fly. Then a bear grabs the fish and eats it. Then a hunter shot the bear, and a mouse saw some crackers and then leaped on the cracker and ate it. Then a cat runs down to get the mouse, trips, and falls into the water, and that's the story of how six inches can get a pussy wet.

Why is Peter Pan always flying? He Neverlands!

Where do sheep go to get their hair cut? The baa-baa shop.

Why did Adele cross the road? To sing, “Hello from the other side!”

How do trees access the internet? They log in.

Did you get them? Me neither. I mean, it is worst jokes ever. I'm kidding, I actually do understand them.

Girlfriend after sex: How did you get so good at eating pussy?

Boyfriend: My mom taught me.