Get jokes

The ball kept getting bigger and bigger...

And then it hit me.

A bully says, "I get 10x more girls than you" to a gay kid.

Then the gay kid says, "10 X 0 is still 0."

When your boy tries to have a bad day while you're on your period:

Oh, you have a cold? How rude of me. I just laid an egg, and now my body is ripping down the walls of my uterus. But can I get you a tissue?

What's common in vampires and American kids?

They both don't get old.

What’s one thing that an orphan can never get in poker?

A full house.

What's the difference between cotton and an orphan?

One gets picked.

Why shouldn't orphans get a phone?

They would get stuck in an app because they can't find the home button.

Girls: Boys are like games, they're meant to get played.

Boys: Girls are like stones, the flat ones get skipped.

Dark humor is like having parents, not everybody gets them.

Yo momma's so fat, when she gets an abortion, she can feed the entire country of Africa leftovers.

Q: What did the late cannibal get when he got to the party?

A: A cold shoulder.

Why do orphans like to play tennis?

Because that’s the only love they will get.

If you're pro-life, I hope you get hit by a bus today!

Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth, then it's a soap opera.

When I get jokes. They aren't f****** restarted like you.

My sister.

My friend in a wheelchair is autistic and tried to fight me, so I said: "If you wanna fight me, I'll run up the stairs, and by the time you get up the stairs, I'll already be down the stairs waiting," and he started crying.

You're so fat you need butter to get in the car.

I find it interesting that if you rearrange the letters in the word “Mother-in-law” you get the words “Woman Hitler”.

Why can't an orphan play baseball?

Because they can't get a home run.

What's the difference between a puppy and an orphan?

Puppies get adopted.