Game jokes

Osama's aim was horrible. One of his angry birds missed and hit a field in Pennsylvania.

Why do orphans play Sims?

Because they can make themselves a family.

I made a 3D game about a depressed, self-harming goth. It's mostly unskippable cutscenes.

Slavery is like Pokémon, you gotta catch them all.

When you ask your sister if she wanna smash, but then she grabs the Switch.

I tried to warn my son about playing Russian roulette. It went in one ear and out the other.

How is slavery different from Pokémon?

There are different types of Pokémon.

A man walks into a pharmacy and buys multiple containers of Tylenol, and the clerk asks why he's buying all of these. He replies with, "I'm playing 1 pill eat 100."

Friend: Want to play Fall Guys?

Friend 2: Yup.

Friend: Ok, so let me ju- wait, where are you going?

Friend 2: I'm gonna jump off.

Friend: Why?

Friend 2: We are playing Fall Guys, right?

I went to a park, then I kicked a ball at a kid in a wheelchair, then screamed "Rocket League!"

I spy with my little eye nothing because I only have two normal-sized eyes.

Why does the adopted kid like playing GTA? Because he wants to be wanted.

I got the newest Call of Duty game! I got a 200 kill streak, then I went home and played COD.

One day, a priest and a nun went to play golf together.

In the first shot, the priest missed his shot and said, "Fuck, I missed it!"

The nun replied, "Hey, you should not curse."

In the second shot, the priest missed his shot again and said, "Fuck, I missed again!"

The nun replied, "Hey, stop swearing, or else God will punish you."

In the next shot, the priest missed once again. He shouted, "Fuck this, this game is bullshit!"

The nun replied, "Enough! God is definitely going to punish you anytime now."

Suddenly, a thunderbolt struck the nun and killed her. The clouds separated from the sky, and there was a voice in the sky saying, "Oh, fuck, I missed!"

What were the twin towers plains?

God's playing Jenga.

Why can't orphans have a five-star GTA because they're not wanted?

What is Africa's most played game?

The Hunger Games.

Why doesn't China have a cricket team?

They always eat the bat.

Little Johnny and his teacher were telling each other jokes and riddles. His teacher asked, "Three birds were sitting on a wire, a hunter shot one. How many are left?" Little Johnny replied, "None, because the sound would scare the other two away." His teacher said, "No, but I like the way you think!"

Little Johnny replied, "Alright, now I have one for you. What goes in dry and hard and comes out soft and hard?" His teacher was shocked and said, "Little Johnny!" He replied, "It's gum! But I like the way you think!"

People be like: "What happened to Fruit Ninja? It was on your phone."

Me: "I upgraded, now I can play on my pro max thigh/wrists."