Fucking jokes

What did one Justin say to the other Justin?

- Fuck you.

Rapist: "Get into the fucking van!"

Kid: "mi gniog ot tell ym momy"

Rapist: "Fine" (Grabs a white kid instead)

STOP POSTING ABOUT AMONG US! I'M TIRED OF SEEING IT! MY FRIENDS ON TIKTOK SEND ME MEMES, ON DISCORD IT'S FUCKING MEMES!

I was in a server, right? And ALL OF THE CHANNELS were just Among Us stuff. I-I showed my champion underwear to my girlfriend and t-the logo I flipped it and I said "hey babe, when the underwear is sus HAHA DING DING DING DING DING DING DING DI DI DING." I fucking looked at a trashcan and said "THAT'S A BIT SUSSY." I looked at my penis. I think of an astronauts helmet and I go "PENIS? MORE LIKE PENSUS" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHGESFG

What happens when you cross a cow and a redneck?

The redneck fucks the cow.

How did Mary get pregnant with baby Jesus?

God fucked her.

Why did the beans fuck the mum to make bouncing beans?

Fuck, my dad has cancer, lol.

Paedophiles are f***ing immature assholes.

How do you f**k a sheep?

Put your d**k in it and face it off the cliff edge. It'll keep going backwards as you push forwards.

Someone fucked a member of BTS.

"9/11 was not funny; it was plane wrong because my dad was the best fucking pilot in Jeddah."

A kid was asking a mother for money.

Mother: Sorry, I don't have money.

The kid kept asking the mother for money.

Mother: I already told you I don't have money.

The kid (the middle child): I'm your fucking child!

What do you call a rabbit with a crooked dick?

Fucks funny.

Papyrus: I hate you, Frisk.

Frisk: This is why Mettaton doesn't fucking love you.

Sans: Kid, I will kill you.

Papyrus: (Remembers something) That's why you don't have a lover, you lonely giraffe!

Dad fucked Mom.

Mom fucked son.

Son fucked sister.

Sister fucked dog.

Dog fucked cat.

Cat fucked bird.

Bird fucked fish.

Fish fucked Dad.

Dad really liked it!

Q. What's the difference between fucking a coma patient and fucking a cabbage?

A. You have to cut a hole in the cabbage.

When God make white people he said, "FUCK I'M OUT OF PAINT!"

I had a party the other day. I made sure there were vegan options. They make do or fuck off.

There's nothing stronger than love, except for an M32 Rotary Grenade Launcher because fuck you and everyone near you.

Fuck nugget!