Friend jokes

Hello Honey Bunches, it's me, Your Narrator. I was told by my buddy youthpartorryan he's in the middle of a war... I may be super wholesome but war against my buddy? Ho ho ho, no! A STORM IS COMING. #BestFriends

When someone has an imaginary friend, you call them weird and crazy.

But when a group of people have an imaginary friend, you call it religion. :)

Qualification Check:

Single

Taken

Friended ✔

Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year?

Friend: Why?

Me: Because they don't have a mother or father's day.

My best friend is an orphan, and we try to have sleepovers, but his parents never say yes.

I love you. You too. I love you. You have a good night. Love. Love. I love you. You and your mom, love. Love. You have the best friends. Love. You have fun. Love. Is it good? You you have to walk home from school and walk walk home from school. I have fun at home.

What do you say when your friend has an ankle sprain?

"Damn bro, you got an ankle spring!"

A guy went to a bar and said to a friend that he found a girl on the railroads and said they had the best sex ever.

His friend asked, "Did you get any head?"

The guy said, "No, I couldn't find it."

Kenneth's hairline [is] friends with Moses.

"My friend and her boyfriend were kissing until she puts her tongue down his throat, and what happens next is really weird."

The tongue gets stuck in his throat and starts to guh-guh-gughhh trying to get her tongue out of his throat, but it cumssssss out with spit all over his tongue, then they break up because he didn't want that to happen ever again...:/

My friend said, "Let's have a sleepover."

Little did I know it was just at prison.

A girl in the shop was getting bullied. She came to me saying, "I’m getting bullied." I told her, "Stand up for herself."

What does the ocean do to its friends? It waves. (*Sorry, I wasn’t making any jokes for a while. I was getting sick of this thing.*)

I made a bet with my friend that I couldn’t create a working car with spaghetti.

You should have seen her face when I drove pasta! 😂

The Egyptian god of sun's name is Ka.

My friend: Where does the sun god go to get a shoe?

Me: In a Ka-boot sale :D

Friend: What would happen when someone stole the shoe?

Me: Call The Police Ka!!!

My friend broke his tie. That's a tie breaker.

When my friend fell, I didn't crack up, but the sidewalk did.

What does an emo kid say to his best friend?

"Let's hang out."

Friend: You ok, man?

Me: Yea... I'll just leave myself "hangin'" tonight...

Tigger was playing hide & seek, so he looked in the toilet, but all he found was Pooh.