Hope Jokes

Anus
in Depression

To whoever stole my antidepressants I hope you are happy now

Theres an outbreak of the foot and mouth disease, it can affect pigs and cows.

I hope my teacher will be ok

sofunnyitsbad
in Funny

one day I came to my mom and said "MOM!!! I can make a butterfly!"

mom: "no you can't.."

me: *throws butter out the window* me: "look I made a butterfly!"

lol this isn't funny but I hope you liked it

Overwatch_Gamer321
in Puns

I hope when I inevitably choke to death on gummy bears, people just say I was killed by bears and leave it at that

Anonymous
in Nun

What's the difference between a nun and a woman in a bath tub? One's got hope in her soul, the others got soap in her hole.

2
Anonymous

My syndrome may be down but my hopes are always up

0
Anonymous

A police man once said I will never forget 9/11 I said I hope not that’s your phone number

Anonymous
in Depression

To the guy who stole my depression medication, I hope you're happy

Anoynoumys274

Cremation: My last hope for a smoking hot body.

Overwatch_Gamer321
in Puns

There was the person who sent ten different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did.

0
Anonymous

I was watching the local chief police in America, he said we will never forget 911. I thought i should hope not its your phone number.

2
Charles

Two men are in a rainforest and one of them is peeing. Suddenly a snake jumps out of some bushes and bites the man’s penis. The other man says, “ Oh my God, I will go to a doctor immediately!”. He didn’t have enough time to load the man into the car so he went straight to the hospital. The man told the doctor what happened and the doctor said, “You will have to make an incision at the wound and suck the poison out. The man wen back to the other man and said, “ There is no hope, you will die.”

6
Anonymous

i love murder shows... wish me luck cause im kinda hoping to be on one one day

Jake Paul

A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant. After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: “Well, I hope you like changing diapers!” She replies: “Oh my god! Am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?” To which he responds: “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”

5
quandale dingle
in Orphan

Dads are like boomerangs. I hope.

Anonymous
in Orphan

Orphans always dip their Oreos in water? Hoping their dad comes back with the milk.

Anonymous
in Country

After getting in the White House, D.Trump gets a letter.... ... from the Iranian president. He opens it and to his surprise there is a paper with a weird looking code on it:

370HSSV 0773H

All confused, Trump contacts the FBI and forwards the letter to them in hope they can figure out the meaning, but they weren't able to. Trump gets angry and sends the letter to both the CIA and NSA, and they also fail to figure out the meaning of the letter.

One of the agents suggest Trump to ask for MI6's help, so he does and few minutes after a British agent sends a fax to his secretary: Tell your president he was holding the letter upside down.

4
in Orphan

Like this if you laughed.

These orphan jokes would leave them crying to their mommies if they had any.

I made a website for orphans .Unfortunately, it doesn’t have a home page.

Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.

Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father

Why do orphans love boomerangs? Because they come back. (Clearly someone didn't come back with the milk)

Why was the orphan so successful? When they told him go big or go home, he only had one option.

What’s the only advantage of being an orphan? Nobody makes jokes about yo mamma.

Hope you had fun reading this! My friend and I laughed reading all of em!

Anonymous
in Depression

Someone broke into my house and took my anti-depressants... I hope they're happy now 😐

Hello! I hope you're having a good day or night! Mind commenting when you laughed the hardest and why? Like if you like this post!