I'll never forget my dad's last words before he kicked the bucket: "Hey, look how far I can kick this bucket!"
Women be like if men are gone, Earth would be a better place, (forgetting) women help to create war, weapons, animal and human cruelty, and have helped to enforce laws that oppress them.
Why did the chicken cross the road
He forgot his eggs
1.) What’s yellow and can’t swim?
- A bus full of children.
2.) Did you hear about the Pillsbury Dough Boy?
- He died of a yeast infection.
3.) I will never forget my grandad’s last words...
- “You’re still holding the ladder, right?”
4.) I have a fish that can breakdance...
- Only for 20 seconds though, and only once.
5.) Give a man a match and he will be warm for a few hours...
- Light a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
I’ll never forget my dad’s last words. “Erase my search history, son.”
911 help. Hello?
Never mind, forget it. You're so stupid 😡😡😡😡😏
Yo... Kobe, you're going down man. Did you forget the low grade fuel?
I'm always forgetting these kinds of jokes. I also forgot my son's name.
What's one piece of stationary gay kids always forget to bring to school? A ruler.
Why is September 11th an awesome birthday to have?
Because no one forgets it! :)
God: I feel like I'm forgetting something... oh no, Earth! *sees it on fire* Oh, it's fine.
People of Earth: *running and screaming*
Santen: *to God* Really?
I'll never forget my grandpa's last words:
"You need to park a little closer."
What's the natural cure to an old man's inability to forgive people?
Alzheimer's.
The fact I couldn't hear the announcements at my school because the boys in my advisory are clapping with no hands should be a joke just in itself. They were making sexual faces as well, oh, and don't forget the moaning they do.
In kindergarten, we were starting to learn how to use "big kid words." On Monday, the teacher asked everyone to share what they did over the weekend, but we had to use big kid words.
Eventually it got to my turn, and the teacher asked me what I did over the summer. I told her I read a book. She asked me what book, and to remember to use "big kid words." I'll never forget the horrified look on her face when I replied with "Winnie the Shit."
Sometimes I think back on all the people I’ve lost and remember why I stopped being a tour guide.
Give a man a match, and he’ll be warm for a few hours. Set him on fire, and he’ll be warm for the rest of his life.
You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving. You need a parachute to go skydiving twice.
My grandfather said my generation relies too much on the latest technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
I’ll never forget my father’s last words to me just before he died: “Are you sure you fixed the brakes?”
Not to brag, but I can forget what I’m doing while I’m doing it.
I could never forget my grandfather's last words. "Stop shaking the ladd-"
I will never forget my little brother's last words, RIP.
His last words: "Paint doesn't taste good."
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your grandma died, your dad left you too, Now you're living with your old grandma coot. Oh, let's not forget your mom left you, too. You gon' live alone, die alone, with no roses on your casket, too.
