Forgetfulness jokes

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your grandma died, your dad left you too, Now you're living with your old grandma coot. Oh, let's not forget your mom left you, too. You gon' live alone, die alone, with no roses on your casket, too.

I'm always forgetting these kinds of jokes. I also forgot my son's name.

9/11 isn't something we should joke about. Some people can remember where they were when they found out. I'll never forget where I was when I found out.

It was 9:37, September 10th, 2001. I was in a cave in Iraq when my friend Mohammad told me.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

9/11.

9/11 who?

You said that you would never forget!

Mom died, so I planted mums and forget-me-nots all over her grave site.

"Don't forget you are what you eat," said one person. "Then I should eat a skinny person!" said the other.

My dad went for the milk, but he left his wheelchair.

I hope when you count, you lose the number you were on.

I thought I told you to lock up when I left this morning. This is why our shit gets stolen all the time!

How do you die from Alzheimer's? You forget how to breathe.

You can laugh at how men are stupid. But remember their favorite thing.

It starts with "M" and ends with "arriage".

If you guessed "Marriage" you're stupid. It's miscarriage and don't forget it. The joke never gets old to him. Just like the baby.

I'll never forget my grandma's last words, "What are you doing in here with that hammer?"

If you're ever in need of a punching bag, just go to your local Alzheimer's unit.

They'll forget you were there in like three minutes.

What's the difference between a blonde chick and Alzheimer's?

None, because they both forget a lot.

I've got not much of anything to be honest.

Been in special classes in school.

Not liked by people.

Only relationship I've ever had and she cheated on me.

31 years old and never had sex, pathetic.

Not very smart.

Don't look good.

Hate myself more than anything.

Been a failure at everything in life.

Probably be alone forever.

People treat me like crap.

Can't do anything right.

And the list goes on and on.

So the question is why haven't I killed myself yet? The answer is, I forget. I'm a extreme procrastinator, keep just putting it off because I'll probably just fuck it up anyway.

What happens when an angel and nun "have some fun and forget pills"?

The nun gets pregNUNt.

Tell a woman she's beautiful a hundred times, and she won't believe you. Tell a woman she's fat once, and she will remember it for the rest of her life because elephants never forget.

I will never forget my grandfather's last words:

"Can you hold the ladder correctly, damn it!"

I have a joke about lazy people!

Actually... forget it... it won't work.

I was gonna tell a memory loss joke, but I forgot it.