Foot jokes
Why can't Jesus walk on water anymore?
Because he has holes in his feet.
There's an outbreak of foot and mouth disease, it can affect pigs and cows.
I hope my teacher will be ok.
How do you get a hippy pregnant?
Cum on her feet and let the flies do the rest.
Why did the ball person go to the doctor?
He was kicked in the balls.
What’s the best part about putting a baby in a blender feet first?
Watching their expression change.
A guy runs into a bar and yells, “Quick! How tall is a penguin?”
The bartender says, “Three feet tall.”
The guy says, “Oh my God! I just ran over a nun!”
Yo mama so fat that she broke the scale when she put one foot on it.
A woman asked Stephen Hawking to dance, and he replied, "I'm not much good, I have two left feet."
"Then how about Karaoke?"
To which he replied, "I have two left throats."
Wipe your feet before entering, but in Stephen Hawking's case, it is "Wipe your wheels."
Jesus has a twisted humor.
kittens cute cuddly and loveable oh yeah, I almost forgot, add razors that stick out [of] their feet.
Why did the orphan dig six feet under?
To find his parents.
How to make an orphan's feet bleed? Make them run in place until their parents get them.
What's the difference between a wanted person and a wanted handicapped person? The handicapped person wasn’t last seen on foot.
If your nose runs and your feet smell, you are probably built upside down.
What did Jesus say when they removed the nails from his hands?
"Feet! Feet!"
One thing about disabled people is they never set foot in prison.
What is 3 feet tall and sits at the bottom of children's beds?
A: Garry Glitter's boots.
1. Are you talking to me because I think you talked to my backside?
2. Your mom must taste good because it is always in your mouth.
3. My foot lasts longer than your life.
Me: How does this thing work?
ForTnite kid: Oh, you don’t know how to use a pistol? Look, I’ll show you.
ForTnitekid: *shoots foot*
Me: That wasn’t a very good demonstration.
I don't have a carbon footprint; I just drive everywhere.