Foot jokes
A woman asked Stephen Hawking to dance, and he replied, "I'm not much good, I have two left feet."
"Then how about Karaoke?"
To which he replied, "I have two left throats."
Wipe your feet before entering, but in Stephen Hawking's case, it is "Wipe your wheels."
Jesus has a twisted humor.
kittens cute cuddly and loveable oh yeah, I almost forgot, add razors that stick out [of] their feet.
You are so hairy, Bigfoot took your picture!
Why did the orphan dig six feet under?
To find his parents.
How to make an orphan's feet bleed? Make them run in place until their parents get them.
What's the difference between a wanted person and a wanted handicapped person? The handicapped person wasn’t last seen on foot.
If your nose runs and your feet smell, you are probably built upside down.
What did Jesus say when they removed the nails from his hands?
"Feet! Feet!"
One thing about disabled people is they never set foot in prison.
What is 3 feet tall and sits at the bottom of children's beds?
A: Garry Glitter's boots.
1. Are you talking to me because I think you talked to my backside?
2. Your mom must taste good because it is always in your mouth.
3. My foot lasts longer than your life.
Me: How does this thing work?
ForTnite kid: Oh, you don’t know how to use a pistol? Look, I’ll show you.
ForTnitekid: *shoots foot*
Me: That wasn’t a very good demonstration.
I don't have a carbon footprint; I just drive everywhere.
Covid said to stay 6 feet... I didn't think Kobe meant it literally.
A 7-foot-tall man walks into a restaurant with his 4-foot-tall girlfriend, and the maitre d' says to the waiter, “He must be nuts over her.”
What's got 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet?
The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
I’m a short joke.
I’m only five feet tall 😞
Me: *Calls friend* "Dude, I just fell off a 50-foot ladder!"
Friend: "Bro, you ok?!"
Me: "Yeah, lucky I only fell off the first step!"
When your mom tells you to stop playing on the computer, you say, "Foot you!"