Toenail jokes

Broke my toenail yesterday. I'm now presenting you puns/jokes:

1. "Yeah, I broke my toenail, wanna see phoTOES?" 2. "I'm tired of bandaging my toe! Oh. My. GAUZE."

Bro, your toenails are bigger than your IQ.

Q: Why did the elephant paint his toenails red?

A: To hide up cherry trees.

Q: What's the loudest noise in the jungle?

A: Giraffes eating cherries.

Why did orphans have to drink their own piss?

Because last time they went to the bar, they went with their dad and drank some Corona, then got drunk and started eating someone's toenails, so his dad went to go get the milk and everybody had to evacuate the bar. Then the orphan started walking on his teeth and got listed for the top ten wanted animals in the world, so then he felt wanted and went to go home and had nobody to go to, so he found the beer bottle he drunk out of and started pissing in it so he wouldn't die and loved it. So then someone saw him in the bushes pissing in a beer bottle then drinking, so the person who saw him started recording and posted it on YouTube, and the boy became famous, so now he can feel like he was wanted in life after daddy went to go get the milk, then the little boy became really rich.

You smell dirty toenails and pigeon sex.

Circumcision is like getting your dick sucked by a female. If you did not like it when you were a teenager, you probably will not like it when you become an adult.

You can tell a lot about a woman from her ankles. If they are on your shoulders, she probably likes you.

Never buy an epileptic kid light-up Sketchers.

You know how in Pinocchio the French puppets have the thigh rings?

Well, I got them too! Only red and thinner.

What's the same with shoes and slaves?

When they get loose, you tie them up.