Food jokes
Why did the transgender man only eat salad?
Because he was a "her" before.
Why did the cheese fail the test? It couldn't make the grade, curd.
What is the difference between a bag of chips and a gun?
If you pull one of them suddenly, everybody wants to be your friend.
I named my dog "J," and everyone thought I said "jam."
I love sucking on food because if you really think about it, tits can be counted as food, so I could technically suck on a woman's tits.
What's the difference between a noodle and a scaboodle fladooodle?
What do you call a burger 🍔 with one eye?
A one giant.
Every Dorito bag for orphans is family sized.
What’s the difference between a pig and Maddie McCann?
Least a pig had an apple in its mouth when it was spit roasted.
Why did the fruit punch say "What's sup?"
He was so naughty!
I want to be like pizza so I can get cut into 8 pieces.
What do cake and baseball have in common?
Both need batters.
Yo momma's so fat, she doesn't know how to play bacon.
Why did the baby strawberry cry? Because his mom was in a jam!
"Mitchnite burger."
What is the spiciest meat ever? Pepperoni.
Why can't orphans eat a big bag of crisps?
'Cause it's family size...?!
Poop + mouth = yummy for dung Beatles and HEDGEHOGS!
What do you call Dominos when it doesn't know how to cook pizza?
Domi-don't-knows...
I went to a restaurant and a waiter took my order. She had two black eyes, so I ordered real slow.
Because obviously she doesn’t listen.