Food jokes

Give a man a fish, feed him for a day.

Give a man a poison fish, feed him for a lifetime.

What's the difference between a baby and garlic bread? I feel bad when I drop garlic bread.

What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? I can't peanut butter my dick up your ass.

Q: When and where was the biggest BBQ ever?

A: Hiroshima, Japan 1946.

If you're fat and transgender, then would you be considered trans fat?

Why are the Chinese bad at baseball? Because they already ate the bat!

What did the bread say to the peanut butter? "I think your nuts."

How do you make any salad into a Caesar salad? You stab it 23 times.

What's the difference between a refrigerator and a gay guy? You have to ask permission before stuffing it with meat.

If there is a hair, the meat is ruined.

I like Cheetos.

I'm so excited for Christmas Pudding... Pudding these nuts in your mouth.

What is Hitler's favorite food? A hindenburger.

Papa John's pizzeria and abortion clinic. You make 'em, we bake 'em.

What do astronauts eat off of? A satellite dish.

A hot dog and a banana had a race. Who won?

The wiener.

What do girls and noodles have in common?

They both wiggle when you eat them.

Q: Why do orphans eat cereal with water?

A: Because their dad is shopping for the milk.

Hairy vagina is like sweets with the wrapper on. You don't like it, but you still eat it.

My autistic son hates taking baths or showers.

I don’t blame him, I don’t like soggy vegetables either.