Food jokes

I'm always willing to go down on a special needs girl.

Momma always told me to eat my vegetables.

Why don't humans eat raw meat? Because they use technology to cry about raw meat is good. Go and leave, bro, I'm going to eat sushi.

"Why didn't the boy pick up his ice cream?" - Margaret

"Why?" - Depressed boy

"Because he got ran over." - Margaret

"I wish that was me." - Depressed boy

What's the chunkiest part of vegetable soup?

The wheelchair.

Orphan: I'm hungry.

Dad: Let's go to KFC.

Orphan 2: Boy, you don't got a dad!

Yo momma is so stupid, she eats cardboard boxes thinking they're chocolate bars.

What do you call a cow with 2 legs?

Lean beef.

If you think the guy calling you fat is offensive,

Try salad 🥗.

I started crying when dad was cutting onions.

Onions was such a good dog.

Why do orphans eat their cereal with water?

Because their dad never came back with the milk! 😂🤣

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Why did the pope drink horse piss? Because a priest asked him what would he do for a Klondike bar? 🤪 😜

What does your mom say when she is working?

Nothing, it's rude to talk with your mouth full.

How do you saw an apple with no mouth?

A P P L E

How do you disappoint people in Africa?

Send a message saying that you’re going to send trucks full of food, water, and clothing.

But don’t follow through and send the trucks empty.

What's your mom and a dog got in common?

Both will lick dick if you put peanut butter on it.

A boy asks a zookeeper, "Why is there a baguette in a cage?"

The zookeeper says, "It's bread in captivity!"

What did the evil chicken lay? Deviled eggs! Get it guys? "Devil-ed" eggs! 😆

What did the nut chasing the other nut say? "I'mma cashew!"

What do you call a peanut on the allergy table?

A kill streak.

Why can't orphans buy chips?

Because they're family sized!