Food jokes
Drop me in Afghanistan with a Dodge Challenger Super Stock, a Mexican named Jose, a 6 pack of Dr. Pepper, a golden SCAR, a pack of chimichangas, and an M4A1, and I'll have the Taliban saying the Pledge of Allegiance in 4 hours.
Jason Kenney has never worried about putting food on the table for his kids.
"Knuckle babies" don't eat.
Me: I’m going to get burrito 🌯
Friend: You can have my burrito baby.
Gay.
Friend: *begins to moan*
Me: Finna hang up.
I walked in a sushi bar, and the sushi chef looked very o-fish-all!
Yo mama so stupid, she used a fork to save the milk from the cereal.
If you were a vegetable, you would be a cute-cumber.
Why did the cow wiggle?
To make milkshake! 😂😂😂😂😂😂
When we were visiting the Hoover Dam, I started to get a bit hungry. I asked my parents, "Where's the dam snack bar?"
Why does Blake eat cake? Because Caleb can't.
What do Michael Jackson and caviar have in common? They both come on little white crackers.
Michael Jackson went into an Italian restaurant and died because he choked on 9-year-old meatballs.
Only if onions were emo, they'd cut themselves.
What kind of Panera Bread do pencils use?
Panera Lead.
A Nacho has a problem going on, and the Taco says to the Nacho, "Wanna taco 'bout it?"
And the Nacho says to the Taco, "It's nacho problem!"
Why were 9/11 victims so mad?
They ordered three pepperoni pizzas, not two planes!
Why did your friend eat the burger?
Because he wanted to murder all burgers and was starting with this one!
Not really. He was just hungry.
Cheese, gimme cheese!
(inspired by a friend)
What do cannibals eat to freshen their breath?
Men toes.
Fruit is like life. You slowly eat it away as it slowly also begins to rot like everyone I’ve known.
What do you call a white girl having a seizure? A vanilla shake.