Food jokes
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
The apple always gets picked.
Why do orphans dip their cookies in water?
Because their dad never came back with milk. Ohhhhhhhh!
Why did the Twin Towers order from Just Eat?
They wanted some plane fries.
What’s cheese that’s not yours? Nacho cheese!
I like my humans like I like my chicken... Fully cooked.
I love bread so much that I might join a bread cult.
What is 6 inches and long?
A Slim Jim.
Me: I wouldn’t want to be with a shitmate.
Shitmate: You’re so shitable.
Me: Bring banana ice cream.
Shitmate: Never happening.
I drip when you take me in the mouth, what am I? Ice cream.
What do cannibals call newborn babies?
Fresh fruit.
I got fired from the M&M Factory because I sorted out the W's.
"Hey, man, do you have any Ben and Jerry's?"
"Yeah, I have two of them, fresh and preserved in the freezer."
"I meant the ice cream, bro..."
You're so fat you sunk Captain Crunch's ship.
You're so fat your blood type is Nutella.
Boy, if you don't get your "I'm Burger King with my Burger Queen!"
Depression jokes are like food... not every people get it.
This kinda reminds me of when my mum was feeding me. She always used to say, "Open wide for the delicious plane."
What did the toaster say to the piece of bread? "I want you inside me."
Why can't an Asian play baseball?
'Cause they always eat the bat!
What do you get if you cross an avocado and a Glock?
Glockamole.
Did you know an apple and an orphan are different.
An apple gets picked.