Food jokes
[God creating Asians] “Alright, and the design is finished, see our new model, the Asian. It has no hair at all.”
Angel asks, “Does it eat normal food?”
God replies, “(chuckling) Oh no, not at all.”
Dracula was invited to a BBQ. He got stake.
What does Jonathan Davis eat for breakfast? Korn Flakes.
What's green and sings?
Elvis Parsley!
How do you cook macaroni? With a shark-spoon-a-rooni!
I would have told you a cheesy pun, but it was too cheesy. *picks up cheeses*
Hey Jonny, you can buy a...
Pun o' chips at the store!
What was Osama's favourite food... yer nan?
What type of pizza did the 9/11 victims order? Two planes.
What do you get when a dog that is actually a Weeto is caught in an earthquake? Just like a chocolate milkshake, only crunchy!
What do you call a chicken that was cared for? A tendered chicken.
How do you fit 100 babies in a bowl? A blender.
How do you get them out? Tortilla chips.
Applesauce.
Why did Shawn suddenly fly to Mount Everest, leaving behind friends, family, and food?
Someone told him that "Shelby"'s coming 'round the mountain.
I like to eat mom's spaghetti. Now try it with the NEWWWW VEGETTIIII, turn any vegetable into pasta!
What's the difference between a baby and putty?
You can only eat one.
"Are you taco to me? I nacho friend."
What do you get when a cow is caught in an earthquake?
You get a milkshake!
How do you know if a comedian is high?
Comedian: Why did the wings cross the road? To get to chicken.
Two people walk down the road. One says to the other, "Mitch, we passed Weight Watchers 2 minutes ago." He responds, "Jake, the noodle shop is just here. You've been carrying that sh*t on your head for 14 years!"