Food jokes
What did the chocolate dentist say to the other chocolate dentist? Did you "chip" a tooth?
What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A nectarine.
What do you call a herd of cows masturbating?
Beef strokin' off.
What can you tell [is] the difference between Stephen Hawking and a carrot?
Nothing.
Why do basketball players like cookies? Because they can dunk them!
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite food? Microchips.
I don’t have enough money to buy cheese, could you provolone me some money?
Two cannibals are eating a clown. One of them turned to the other and said, "Does this taste funny to you?"
What happens when you see corn looking at you in your window?
A corn stalk!
What does Vin Diesel eat for dinner?
Survival Guilt.
Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he felt crummy!
What does a pizza delivery man and a gynecologist have in common?
They can both smell it, but they can’t eat it.
What was the chip doing at the hairdressers?
It was getting a crinkle cut.
Are you an egg, because you crack me up?
What's the difference between a cat and a banana? It's hard to peel a cat.
Why did the strawberry cry?
Her mom was in a jam.
I know it sounds cheesy, but I feel grate!
What do you get when you stuff some cows into a food container?
A can o' bull.
Why did the man decide to work at a pizza place?
Because he kneaded the dough!
I accidentally drank a little food coloring last night. I ended up dying inside.