Food jokes
What do you get if you cross a pig and a witch with sand?
A ham sandwich.
What was purple and conquered the world?
Alexander The Grape.
What do you eat out of?
- A bowl.
Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Man, it's hot in here!"
The other muffin says, "OH MY GOSH A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!"
What do you call a steak that tastes bad?
A MISsteak.
What do you call a down syndrome person that was hit by a car?
Mash potato.
The grapes in the supermarket are really raisin' the bars...
Down syndrome and brownies.
Where can you find the freshest vegetables? A school for the disabled!
Liam Gallagher went into a café for a cup of tea. The assistant asked him if "he wanted a roll with it."
Q: Why should you never invite an aardvark to your family reunion?
A: Because it will eat your "aunts."
I always talk to my taco before I eat it.
One time it said it was having a bad day and I asked what's wrong. He said I don't want to taco 'bout it!
Why does sour cream have an expiration date?
We should stop taking the piss out of Asian people. I mean, they already have enough on their plates... like cats and dogs.
Eat my butt.
I had a dream about the whole ocean being filled with orange soda.
Turns out it was a Fanta sea.
What is Beethoven's favorite fruit?
A Ba-na-na-na! (To the tune of Beethoven's 5th symphony)
Yo mama is so fat when she sees a bus full of white people, she thinks it's a Twinkie, lmao xd.
Q: What's a pedophile's favorite place to eat?
A: Schools because there is a wide variety of choices.
What's red and white and lives in a blender?
A baby.