Food jokes
What's the difference between a watermelon and an orphan?
One you cut into 2 with a knife.
And the watermelon you cut into pieces.
I like Cheetos.
What do you call a Turk eating turkey?
A cannibal.
Why are hindustan bhai so good at Python?
When they are hungry, they use Python and take credit card information ;). You know what they say, you give a man a curry and he eats for a day, you give a man a language and he eats for a lifetime.
Your daddy's so fat, he tripped over a rock. He thought it was a chip.
What did the blender say to the orange juice?
"What the fuck are you, you are so fucking stupid, shut the fuck up."
Why do orphans eat cereal without milk?
Their dad never came with it.
I want to be like pizza so I can get cut into 8 pieces.
What did the blind man say to his dog after eating dinner?
"Just ate a tasty steak!"
Peanuts are hard to crack, just like my ex-wife's heart.
Happiness is like food, not everyone gets it.
Thing 1: What's the difference between nuts and almonds?
Thing 2: I don't know, what?
Thing 1: One gets hard faster.
Do you want to wear my sombrero?
Or is that nacho style?
Why can’t an orphan eat a bag of chips?
Because it was family size.
What is the same thing between apples and orphans?
Apples actually get picked.
What did the egg say to the other egg?
"You crack me up!" 😂
Why do orphans like apples? Because they get picked.
You're so fat that you're gonna be my next hamburger for dinner and the next In-N-Out, just like your parents.
Waiter: Can I have your order?
Me: No, it’s mine!
What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.