Fitness jokes
Not a joke but there's nowhere else to post this, (mainly this post is for the broke people without a gym). Did you know that the body can't tell if you're using weights? So lifting weights are optional.
Some beginner workouts without weights for like really weak people:
1. Sit-ups 10 reps 2. Push-ups 20 per reps 3. Squats 10 per reps 4. Crunches 10 per reps
No matter how big the jar, there is one thing that can never fit inside it. What is it?
What do you call a black person having a fit?
A chocolate milkshake.
Your earlobes are so big, you can fit your mom inside of them 5000 times and still have room for more!
"There is no way you can fit in there."
"Says who?"
"Your mom."
"When?"
"Last night."
"OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-"
Wow, you did 10 chin-ups? Was it 1 for each chin?
How many people fit in a tree?
I don't know, you tell me.
Yo, barber fucked up so bad he pulled out a "Plants vs. Zombies" map and that shii fit perfectly.
Hi guys, I am Logan Taub the toad. I just want to say that my cock is so, so, so tiny. It could fit 50 times in the crack of my butt chin!!!!! Also, I am transπ
You're so fat that when they tried to print a picture of you through the computer, they couldn't fit you in the whole picture because you were so big!
Yo mama is so fat that when she walks, she causes earthquakes. She is so big that she has her own zip code and gravity field. She is so heavy that she needs a crane to get out of bed. She is so obese that she can't fit in any clothes, except for a circus tent. She is so large that she blocks the sun and causes eclipses.
Want to know how to fit 71 people in a car? Two in the front while we handle 69 in the back.
SMG4 Mario be like in Ohio: I donβt wanna do this...
Candice everyone: Candice?
Mario: CAN DEEZ NUTS FIT IN YOUR MOUTH!
Your mum is so fat, when she was sitting on a scale, the number couldn't even fit on the scale and came shooting out!
Your mum is so fat, when she roleplayed Wonder Woman, she couldn't fit in the invisible jet.
I asked my date to meet me at the gym today. She didn't show up. That's when I knew we weren't gonna work out.
You're so skinny, you can barely fit through a door crack.
Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app, and it just sent an ambulance to my house.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Ahoy Mateys.
Ahoy Mateys who?
Ahoy mateys, balls fit in your mouth? LOLOLOLOLOLOL
what's the difference between morbid humor & dark humor?
dark humor fits 10 people in 1 container.
morbid humor fits 1 person on ten containers.