How many astronauts can you fit into a VW Bug? 11, 4 in the seats, seven in the ashtray.
Yo mama so fat,
She doesn't fit in a Titan's mouth.
(Attack on Titan; Shingeki no Kyojin)
How do you fit three gay guys on a bar stool?
Flip it upside down.
How did Santa fit down the chimney?
He buttered it.
How many gay guys can you fit on a bar stool? Four, just flip it over.
What's the best thing about being a pedophile? You can choose the fit profession where you find kids most.
What's the hardest part about being a pedophile?
Fitting in.
Why did the gym close down? -- It just didn't work out.
Yo mama is so unfamiliar with the gym, she calls it James.
"Chuck? How many push-ups can you do?" -- "All of them."
"I'm sorry," the doctor says, "you have a rare and very contagious disease. We must quarantine you, and you'll only be fed cheese and bologna."
"Will that cure me?" the patient asks.
"Well, no," the doctor replies, "but it's the only food that will fit under the door."
A computer science student is studying under a tree, and another pulls up on a flashy new bike. The first student asks, "Where'd you get that?"
The student on the bike replies, "While I was studying outside, a beautiful girl pulled up on her bike. She took off all her clothes and said, 'You can have anything you want.'"
The first student responds, "Good choice! Her clothes probably wouldn't have fit you."
