Factory jokes

What is a photographer's favorite card game?

SNAP!

Bro, are you an Oompa Loompa? Because you look like you just came from the chocolate factory.

I bet you go grocery shopping at the Twinkie Factory.

What's another place orphans can't work at besides SC Johnson?

The Home Depot.

I used to work at a T-shirt factory before the company folded.

Did you hear about that cheese factory that exploded in France?

There was nothing left but de Brie!

The other day a squirrel asked me for a job. I asked him, "What jobs did you have previously?"

Calmly he answered, "I am a pilot. I can pick it up from here and pile it over there. I also can fly a sign!"

"Too bad, this is a nut cannery, and we're 100% automated. We don't need anyone at this time, sorry."

"No worries, I'm totally nuts anyway. Guess I'll fly a sign across town, don't have bus fare!"

My brother eats water from the pig factory at 1:00 a.m., and blames a deaf kid, so he ended up going to solitary.

What do you call a factory that makes okay products?

"A satisfactory."

Little off topic but...

Mum: You wouldn't be here without me.

Son: And my birth certificate is a sorry letter from the condom factory.

Mum: Fair point.

I got fired from the bowling ball factory for throwing out the ones that had holes in them.

Why did the man get fired from the calendar factory?

He only took a day off.

I got fired from the M&M Factory because I sorted out the W's.

What do you call a phone that talks?

A reader in a leader.

Why do you like cream instead of bugs?

Because bugs can kill you.

Yo mama so ugly, when she entered the scare factory, she came out with a job application.

I used to work at a candlestick factory, but only on the wickends! It was illuminating!

One day, this dad and his son went to a basketball factory, and the son said, "I want to buy some balls." The dad said, "What for?" The son said, "So you can have some balls."

I went to the bathroom and into a stall to see a hole in the wall. It reminded me of "The Lickable Wallpaper" from "Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory." I jokingly started licking. Though, the carrot tasted musky and kinda wrinkly.

I worked at a calendar factory, but I got the sack for taking a few days off!