Factory jokes

Bro, are you an Oompa Loompa? Because you look like you just came from the chocolate factory.

Why did the homophobic boy get fired from the banana factory?

He kept throwing away the bent ones!

I bet you go grocery shopping at the Twinkie Factory.

Did you hear about that cheese factory that exploded in France?

There was nothing left but de Brie!

I used to work at a T-shirt factory before the company folded.

What's another place orphans can't work at besides SC Johnson?

The Home Depot.

The other day a squirrel asked me for a job. I asked him, "What jobs did you have previously?"

Calmly he answered, "I am a pilot. I can pick it up from here and pile it over there. I also can fly a sign!"

"Too bad, this is a nut cannery, and we're 100% automated. We don't need anyone at this time, sorry."

"No worries, I'm totally nuts anyway. Guess I'll fly a sign across town, don't have bus fare!"

What do you call a factory that makes okay products?

"A satisfactory."

My brother eats water from the pig factory at 1:00 a.m., and blames a deaf kid, so he ended up going to solitary.

Little off topic but...

Mum: You wouldn't be here without me.

Son: And my birth certificate is a sorry letter from the condom factory.

Mum: Fair point.

I got fired from the bowling ball factory for throwing out the ones that had holes in them.

Why did the man get fired from the calendar factory?

He only took a day off.

I got fired from the M&M Factory because I sorted out the W's.

What do you call a phone that talks?

A reader in a leader.

Why do you like cream instead of bugs?

Because bugs can kill you.

Yo mama so ugly, when she entered the scare factory, she came out with a job application.

I used to work at a candlestick factory, but only on the wickends! It was illuminating!

One day, this dad and his son went to a basketball factory, and the son said, "I want to buy some balls." The dad said, "What for?" The son said, "So you can have some balls."

I went to the bathroom and into a stall to see a hole in the wall. It reminded me of "The Lickable Wallpaper" from "Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory." I jokingly started licking. Though, the carrot tasted musky and kinda wrinkly.

Why did the person get fired from the calendar factory?

Because they took a day off.