Why do emo people go to the store with no money? Because they Just scan their bar code and get every thing free.
“Don’t sneeze”
Every time I was in the bathroom with my friends I would always tell them “Don’t sneeze” and when I did they just laughed so hard. And when we sneezed we laughed even harder.
Also,
“It dangles and swung” Language art quizzes are the best
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
BlessedBrian must have been born on April Fools’ Day... because he’s a JOKE every day of the year
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
If I had a coin for every time someone said "If I had a coin" I'd still be living paycheck to paycheck.
At least he got D.L.A. Disability Living Allowance so it's not all bad. Every cloud has a silver lining...even a mushroom cloud.
Father talks to his 5-year-old son: “No, Petie, you don’t have to worry. There is no monster sleeping under your bed. It sleeps every day in the bed next to me.”
I ran into a fat woman today she said next time don’t hit me. I said I don’t think I have enough gas to go around. Then the ground start to rumble with every step she took
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
In Africa, in every 60 seconds,... a minute passes
After every line, say “I’m a man.” I went to the club. (I’m a man) I met a girl. (I’m a man) I took her to the bar. (I’m a man) We got some drinks. (I’m a man) I took her home. (I’m a man) We got in bed. (I’m a man) She whispered in my ear, (I’m a man)
Astrophysics fact: If you count every stars on a Saturday night, you're autistic.
What did the cow say every morning Good moorning!!
Why ain’t Indian packiscan aloud in the World Cup of baseball? Every time they hit a corner they open a shop
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar. These two have been great friends for over 20 years...play golf together...and meet every Tuesday at a classy bar for a glass of wine...talk about golf...good wine and spiritual matters. One day while at the bar enjoying a glass of merlot, the Rabbi raises his glass of wine and says to his long time friend.."brother, do you believe Jesus turned water into wine?"...the Priest thinks for a moment and raises his glass of wine and replies..."yes brother, I do believe Jesus turned water into wine...but don't get excited...since Jesus was Jewish, the wine was probably Manischewitz "
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
If I had a genie grant me wishes, I wouldn't wish for a million pounds. I'd just wish that every time I buy something I just have the right amount of money in my pocket at the time
