Every jokes

What’s the difference between Swifties and rap fans?

One rap fan has a higher IQ than every Swiftie combined.

The term "every 60 seconds" is so stupid.

You know Africans don’t get seconds.

Every depressed person just has to say, "I WANT TO JUMP OFF THAT TALL BUILDING RIGHT THERE!" and then points to the building and runs up to it like an immature child, and then they get disappointed when they aren't allowed into the building.

I’m always the first person in line at school for lunch.

I just cut everyone.

I said to the emo girl, "She gets jealous every time her phone dies."

Your forehead is so big, it takes the sun a year to shine on every part of it.

Every time a midget runs on the grass, the grass tickles their balls.

I try and try every day, but 5 keep coming out. There's so money at this point my walls are built of babies.

Yo mama so fat, she meets every world leader there is!

lmao

What happens once every minute, twice every millennium, but never in a hundred years?

The letter M.

Every good joke has its delivery, except abortion jokes, because they have none.

This kid was crying, so I asked him where his parents were. He just cried harder. I still remember him every time I pass that orphanage.

Bye, I'm Paul Badman. Did you know that you don't have rights? The Articles of Confederation say you don't, and so do I. I believe that until proven innocent, every woman, man, and adult in this country is guilty. And that's why I don't fight for you, Santa Fe!

I have to say that Halloween is my favorite day...

Every time they see me, kids and mothers run away...

I don’t have a costume so please don’t reprimand...

When I open up the door, I’ve got my penis in my hand.

You learn something new every day.

Like the people in 9/11 are the world's fastest readers; they went through 100s in under a second.

A wife and husband go to a barn. The husband picks up a goat and says, “Look at this pig I have to sleep with every night.”

The wife says, “Honey, that’s a goat.”

The husband replies with, “I was talking to the goat.”

What kind of shit does a ghost take every time? A spooky dookie!

I made an advent calendar for a Jehovah’s Witness.

Behind every door someone tells you to fuck off.

I found a key that works for every door at my school.

Have you watched the show "Naked and Afraid"? Well, I play it every Saturday with my uncle.