Kid:what is between moms legs? Dad:paridise. Kid whats between you legs? Dad:the key to paridise. Kid:well uou better change the lock the neighbor has the key to.

I love the smell of my F5 key. – It’s very refreshing.

Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys? He was playing by ear.

Where is the worst place to lock your keys in your car?

The anti abortion clinic because you have to go back in and ask for a coat hanger

What’s worse than locking your keyes in the car in front of an abortion clinic?

Having to go back inside and ask to borrow a hanger.

What’s a aliens favorite computer key?

the space bar!

The other day, I donated my car keys, $1,000, and a passport to a homeless man. You could feel the happiness come from me after he holstered his suppressed shotgun.

Why did the car key never fit in? He was too door key.

Where does a pianist go on vacation?

The Florida Keys.

Did you hear about the shark that ate a key shop? I think it got lockjaw after that.

what did the substrate say to the active site? cmon baby we fit together open my door lock to fkn key

Whats a pirates favourite key on the key board

Others: r

Rrrr you would think so but it be the C

Watch Key/Peele “Detective”

tech administrator of a school: hm, a message from google security? tech administrator of a school: OH SHIT! assistant: WHAT, WHAT, TELL ME? tech administrator of a school: WEVE BEEN COMPROMISED, WE FORGOT TO SECURE THE SITE! assistant: OK, OK, THE KEY IS NOT TO PANIC… let’s call the school board

A FEW MOMENTS LATER

head of school board: HAHAHAHAHAHA! that’s a good one, almost as good as the one with jack, jill, and the ripped condom! HAHAHAHAHAHA tech administrator of a school: HAHAHA yeah I know right whispers you are playing it cool, right? head of school board: whispers yeah were fucked…

TWO HOURS LATER

important fat people in one room: OH FUCK OH NO, HELP PLEASE!!! WAIT, HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO TELL THE PARENTS ABOUT THEIR STOLEN INFORMATION!!!

AND SO THAT WAS THE BIRTH OF RIOTING TEACHER

One day johnae said what do you call a family outing ‘‘INCEST’’ LOW KEY jOHNAE FUKS KIRBY AND PEACH

Person 1 - How the freak did you get in my house!?!?! I locked the door!!!

Person 2 - But I’m your mom… I have a key. You dumbass

Mary had a little lamb Key word is had, her dad’s favorite meat is a human

what is the difference between a man peering through the key hole and a woman in the bath? one is rude and nosy the other is rude and nosy

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