Key Jokes

fatman200
in Puns

What’s a aliens favorite computer key?

the space bar!

Xzavier
in Little Johnny

Little Johnny’s mom is taking a shower little Johnny walks in and asks what is that in between your legs mommy says that is my keyhole the next day little Johnny sees his dad taking a shower and little Johnny asks what is that in between your legs daddy says that is my key the next day little Johnny says to his dad looks like the neighbor has the key to mommy’s keyhole too.

By:Xzavier

I encountered a milf at a bar last night although she is 57 years old, she is still very charming and sexy

we were drinking, chatting, laughing, and having a good time

then, she asked me flirtatiously

“have you ever tried a mother-daughter threesome before?”

I said, “Nope, not yet”.

She drank a little more, and said, “well, darling, tonight is your lucky night.”

So she took me to her place.

She took out her keys

opens her door

turn on the light

and she yells towards upstairs

"Mom, are you still awake?”

Anonymous

Kid:what is between moms legs? Dad:paridise. Kid whats between you legs? Dad:the key to paridise. Kid:well uou better change the lock the neighbor has the key to.

4
Anonymous
in Music

Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys? He was playing by ear.

Anonymous
in Cold

what do you do when you get locked outside your house… you talk to the lock. because communication is key.

Anonymous
in Puns

Whats a pirates favourite key on the key board

Others: r

Rrrr you would think so but it be the C

Anonymous
in Worse

What’s worse than locking your keyes in the car in front of an abortion clinic?

Having to go back inside and ask to borrow a hanger.

Gwen

Why was the piano waiting at the front door?

Cuz it forgot which key to use!

Anonymous
in Computer

I love the smell of my F5 key. – It’s very refreshing.

PaganiniWannaBe
in Orchestra

Why do violists stand for long periods outside of peoples houses? They can’t find the key and don’t know when to come in.

Anonymous
in Music

Where does a pianist go on vacation?

The Florida Keys.

Michael H

Where is the worst place to lock your keys in your car?

The anti abortion clinic because you have to go back in and ask for a coat hanger

0
WISCONSIN-STUDENT

I FOUND A KEY THAT WORKS FOR EVERY DOOR AT MY SCHOOL

ssssshhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeesssssshhhhhh

what key opens a banana

a mon-key

Oogabooga

A guy when back to his apartment,5 Minutes later he said to the receptionist,”it doesn’t fit”so she gave him a new key

0xFFA715
in Puns

Why did the car key never fit in? He was too door key.

in Darkness

A young teen was walking home from school and having a nice day.

She gets home eats, showers, and heads to her room. The young teen hears her mother say something, not sure what she said the girl replies with “ok”.

The young teen was gonna head to bed wondering when her mom was gonna come in and say goodnight she lays in bed, but then she hears her mom’s voice say “Hunny I’m home”, she doesn’t bother to say ok.

Later when she decides to sleep she gets a message from her mom saying to unlock the door that she lost her keys. :)

-Dark_Humor

Anonymous
in Gumdrop

How does a donkey open a door

With a don(key)