Why is mercury like everything else in the world?
Because it gives you cancer.
A Texan and an Alaskan walk in a room. The Alaskan says, "My state is bigger than yours." The Texan says, "It won't be when it melts!"
I took the trash to the recycling bin, and two days later, my mom asked me, "Where's your sister?" I said, "In the recycling line to be turned into a bottle."
What is the difference between a human and a tree and yyyyy night I can drive yyy earth 🌏?
What's the worst living thing on planet earth?
Humans.
What is green and blue?
Grass and the sky.
What does the EPA issue when a person stinks up a room with their smelly farts?
Air quality alert code brown!
What's an emo's favorite way of growing food?
The slash and burn tactic.
Somewhere out there, a tree is tirelessly producing oxygen for BLESSEDBRIAN. I think he owes it an apology.
Did you get your phone from the desert? No wonder why your texts are always so dry.
Don’t kill the Earth, it’s the only one with beer.
What is brown and sticky?
The leftovers of the iceberg.
People in Africa have earth, fire, air, but never water.
What did Africa say to the grass? Get off me!
You're so fat that when you went sunbathing at the beach, Greenpeace came along and pushed you back in the ocean.
I don't trust trees...they look shady.
What is a fun game for an emo kid?
Tug-o-war with a tree.
My mom told me to recycle the trash. I guess I’m taking you for another bike ride!
What runs but does not walk? It's water.
The tortoise was swimming through the lake. His head got stuck in plastic. He said, "Oh dam."
