Environment jokes

Why is there more water than water, because water is water.

So when Kim Kardashian went into the ocean, the lifeguard said, "No plastic littering!"

"Ukraine looks like Fallout 4, woah!"

I don't trust trees...they look shady.

I would roast you but burning trash is bad for the environment.

Keep the planet clean. It's not Uranus.

Don’t kill the Earth, it’s the only one with beer.

I don’t have a carbon footprint. I just drive everywhere.

There was an oil spill in the ocean. Now the ocean can't see!

What’s worse than Sally in one trash can?

Sally in 13 trash cans.

Dump in a stump. Ahahahaha.

What's an emo's favorite way of growing food?

The slash and burn tactic.

An optimist says, "The glass is half full."

A pessimist says, "The glass is half empty."

A scientist walks by and says, "You guys are both wrong. The glass is technically completely full because it is half filled with air."

Then Africa comes by and says, "Stop arguing. At least you guys have water!"

Wanna hear a dry joke? A desert.

What is wet going up and wet going down but doesn't move?

A mountain!

hehehehehehehehehehe

Two people were on a boat. They were afloat on water!

Yo mama is so fat, when she sat on Black Temple, it became Sunken Temple.

There was once a grandfather. He had very little hair, and he lived in a forest.

On his death bed, he was fully bald. So he told his children, "You see my head? I have no hair. All of my hair has been wiped, and I hope this forest doesn't experience the same. Children, every time a tree is cut in this forest, plant a new one in its place."

So for years, and to this day, that forest still stands, each tree being replanted. All because of an old man and his re-seeding hairline.

How is the world like dirt?

Because we don't think twice about it.

Whenever I work late at the hospital, I help the patients sleep.

There isn't a snooze button on the beeping things, and it can be quite annoying, making it hard for the patients to sleep, so I unplug them.