Offensive

Ms Graves

What’s green and smells like pork? Kermit’s finger

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Puns

Rick

What do you call those dead pieces of green stuff left in the bottom of a bowl of Caesar salad?

The last romaines. Now lettuce pray for them.

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Puns

Talory

What did the green light say to the red light - don’t look I’m changing

Singing

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whats green and sings? ELVIS PARSELY!!!

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Yo mama

JAred

Yo mama so ugly when her parents had a gender reveal part the balloon came out green.

Red

ashyondamemekinglaquiva

what’s green then red all over and goes 100mph?

a frog in a blender

Pool

Anonymous

What’s green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? – A pool table.

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Baby

Joseph W.

What’s red and in a corner ? A baby with a razor blade What’s green and in a corner ? The same baby three weeks later

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Card

Anonymous

Why do people not play uno with Mexicans… because they are always stealing the green cards

9

Baby

Anonymous

What’s green and orange and sits at the bottom of the swimming pool?

A baby with burst armbands

Red

Anonymous

What’s Red,Green and goes 90 miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

Difference

steph3n show

Q: What is the difference between a drunk and a stoner at a stop sign? A: The drunk guy runs it and the stoner waits for it to turn green!

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Difference

Anonymous

What is the difference between a climate change and the green house effect once a philosopher twice a sodomite

Little Johnny

U make me barf

The teacher asked her class to use definitely in a sentence. Little Johnny raised his hand to answer, yet the teacher passed him and went on to Kevin. “The sky is definitely blue.” “Very good Kevin,but the sky can also be blue or black.” the teacher replied. Little Johnny raised his hand again as high as he could, yet the teacher passed right over him. And picked Annie from the back of the room. “The grass is definitely green.” “Very good Annie, but it can also be brown.” Little Johnny was waving his hand like crazy seeking her attention. Finally she called on him. “Mines more of a question, but do farts have lumps in them?” “Why no Johnny why would you ask such a question?” She questioned. “Well if they don’t have lumps in them, then I definitely just shit myself.”

6

Smell

Anonymous

What’s green and smells like bacon?

Kermit’s finger.

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Alphabet

John Doe

What’s green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels

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Legs

Anonymous

What’s big, green, has four legs and if it falls out of a tree it can kill you?

A pool table.

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Car

BOY SCOUT

what is red, green, lies in a ditch and is covered in cookie crumbs?

…a girl scout that got hit by a car

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Difference

Ahhaha

What is Green and Red and goes round and round? A frog in a blender (this next one is pretty bad, and I don’t mean it, so don’t get offended) What’s the difference between a Mexican and a park bench? One can support an average family

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