Kim Kardashian jokes

What do you call the space in between Kim Kardashian's breasts?

Silicon Valley.

What does Kim Kardashian and the ocean have in common?

They both have plastic in them.

Q: What did people say when Kim Kardashian was at the beach?

A: Stop littering!

So when Kim Kardashian went into the ocean, the lifeguard said, "No plastic littering!"

What's the difference between Kelly Clarkson and a Florida real estate agent?

A Florida real estate agent screws over seniors, Kelly Clarkson screws little children.

People think Kelly Clarkson shops at Wal-Mart because she's a sloppy redneck. No, it's because toddlers' pants are 75% off everyday!

Amber Heard's Morning Routine

Wake Up. Eat Breakfast. Take a Shit. Get Out of Bed.

If you leave your small children inside a shower with Kelly Clarkson, you're a filthy parent.