What is a kid who loves school?
A smart kid.
How to learn your Vitamins:
A = Art.
B = Bouncy Balls.
C = Cookies.
D = Da Sun.
You'll be smarter than a doctor next time you visit!
An Asian gets a choice between his rice cooker or his son. He instantly picks the cooker and says, "He got a B+ in maths last week; he's a failure!"
How do you prevent a physics teacher from drowning? Shoot her before she touches the water.
POV: An Asian kidnapper kidnapped an Asian kid, and the kidnapper called the kid's mom. Then the mom said, "No, it's fine, my kid got a B, he failed." And the kidnapper let him go saying he doesn't need a failure.
Me: Mom, if Adam and Eve are white, then how were slaves made?
Mom: Well, Eve and the monkey fucked each other.
Me: Oh, okay.
Goes to school.
Teacher: How were humans made?
Me: Eve fucked the monkeys.
Teacher: 😑
"Meow, meow, I'm a dog," said the sped kid.
Did you hear about the volcano that was accepted into Cambridge?
It was a decision on the number of degrees it holds, which is a lot, because volcanoes have lava if they're active. And ours was.
Do you want to know why I hired a protractor to tutor my nephew in IIROC? Because he has degrees. 180 of them. So he's smar[t].
I went to school and everyone was screaming and looking at me. They weren't after I shot them, though.
I put my heart and soul in my report, then my teacher says:
"Hey KIDS were going to repeat making current events about our state til we DIE."
....No wonder when kids leave school they're soulless.
RIP Meh Soul.
Why did the rapper go to school?
To get his degree in FLOW-NOMICS.
Teacher: Now class, if you are dumb, please stand up.
Class: no one stands up.
Teacher: Oh c’mon. I know someone over here is dumb. *waves her finger around the left side of the room*
Little Johnny: *stands up*
Teacher: Oh, Johnny, you think you’re dumb?
Little Johnny: No, I just feel bad you’re standing alone.
Two times four is eight, now stop f***ing asking me!
Why did you scream? Oh... Helen Keller tried to cook... 😨
How does an apple fall from a tree?
I don't know, ask Sir Isaac Newton!
Why is the orphan so dumb?
Because he didn’t have parents to pay for it.
What do you call a short student?
A Ravin.
My friend Joe was a great hunter. He always shot like 3 deer every week.
He was even better at school when he bagged 30 of them.
Where do kittens go on a field trip?
The meowseum.
