Education jokes
Why did the rapper become a teacher?
Because they had a knack for dropping KNOWLEDGE.
Why was Trump banned from music class? He kept putting his finger on D minor.
What was Clinton encouraged to get in college? A minor.
What is the best revenge for getting punished at school?
Go shoot up the school.
Your forehead is so big, I can write an essay on it.
Suzy: How did Jonah fit in the whale?
Teacher: Whales are very big but have small mouths, so Jonah did not actually fit in the whale.
Suzy: Well, the Bible says he did.
Teacher: He did not.
Suzy: When I get to heaven I will ask him how he fit in.
Teacher: How do you know he went to heaven? Maybe he went to hell.
Suzy: Then you can ask him.
Why can’t a blind person be a teacher? Because they can’t control their pupils.
Kid: I got homework.
Mom: Ok, so?
Kid: I got a F in my balls.
Why is there a middle school?
Because the kids that go there are middle class families.
Do you know the teacher that went up in space? She had blew eyes. One blew this way and one blew that way.
What's the difference between a school shooting pistol and a baked potato? The physical composition, of course, but they both pack the same heat.
Why can't orphans go to school? They can't attend parent-teacher conferences.
What do elves study in school?
The elf-abet.
I was writing my final exams, and I saw a question saying to name the smallest thing in the world. To my knowledge, I chose an atom.
My Chemistry teacher said it was PSG. I was shocked beyond repair. Shame on you, PSG, I'm now a college dropout!
There was a kid in my class who said my face looked like a physical reaction (we were learning about that stuff at the time), so I said I made a chemical reaction with his mom last night.
Did you know the Alabama Crimson Tide University has the most handicapped people? You know their motto, "Roll Tide."
True story: my math teacher Mr. Ueberoth accidentally marked a Kahoot as 100 points in Google Classroom instead of 10. If he doesn't find out, the grades will be more hyperinflated than Zimbabwe's economy.
Why did the students eat their homework?
Because the teacher told them it was a piece of cake!
Why can't you do a Math test in the zoo?
Because there are too many Cheetahs!
2 times 4 equals 18?
Why is 6 scared of 7?
7 ate 9 and 10!