Drink Jokes

A neutron walks into a bar and asks, "how much for a beer?" The bartender replies, "for you? No charge!"

What did the kid with Parkinson drink for breakfast? Milkshake

whats thick and has ice in it when you take it out of a blender?

a baby smoothie

So the horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "Why the long face?" UwU

A man and his friend walk into a bar on a 30 storey building and order a drink of beer, then one of the men jumps out the window and he can fly so he says to his mate "Gary, take a sip of this drink it makes you fly!" so Gary takes a sip of the drink, jumps out the window and dies, and the bartender says "gee, superman your a doosh when you drink"

A man enters a bar with some friends, and they all sit down to a drink. After not too long, a man with glasses comes through the front door saying "Anyone who wants to fly off the third story balcony, come upstairs with me!" When no one listens, he shrugs, and everyone watches him go up the stairs. Ten seconds later, he comes back in through the door, again saying "Anyone who wants to fly off the third story balcony, come upstairs with me!" Everyone is amazed, and a few people leave to go fly with him. He keeps coming back into the bar, bringing more and more patrons to join him. The man at the bar is about to join in when the bartender finally sighs. "For the last time Superman, get out of my bar, you're drunk and the only person here that can fly!" The man with glasses frowns. "Where did all the others go, then?"

A roman walks into a Bar and holds up 2 fingers and says "Five beers,please"

If Bruno Mars was to run a pub and sell chocolate bars other than alcoholic drinks then he'll have to call his pub a Mars Bar

What would Stephen Hawking do to get drunk Over charge himself

I was in a bar in Italy, me and a hot chick got along, so I asked her for her number, I remembered that there was a pen in my pocket, but when I searched, it was nowhere to be found, I turned back then I saw Pessi running with it, shame on you Pessi for ruining my night! 😭

My friend had a drink called quick start so I said "that's a quick start to the morning".

A red head, a dark haired, and blonde walk into a bar and agree to fly to the sun! The blonde states " I agree let's leave at night "!

I want diabetes so I can drink loads of coke - Louie Fennell 2018

Yo look they give me and my girl free pizza and a big bottle of rabbit wine yay yay don't drink too much of it you might turn into a wine rabbit.

My Daughter is Super Smart! She pours her own drinks on the floor

i had to stop drinking because i got tired of waking up in my car driving 90

i took a sip of water

Why do orphans only drink water in cereal? Cause dad never brought home the milk...