Depression jokes
Less depresso, more espresso, I'm still depressed, but now I'm fast.
I laughed at my life so hard.
I gave an emo kid money.
He gave me the great depression.
Why is the world split in half? Because fat people are weighing the Earth down.
My friend: Hey, why are you always smiling?
Me: 'Cause life is a joke and we’re all slacking it off.
Yo, I feel like shit when you're around.
When I died, my friend said he'd cover me.
What will make a depressed teenager happy?
A cliff.
My parents used to make me and my siblings apologize to the ground when we stomped.
If I had done "it," I would have gotten SO many apologies.
How many emissions does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, they just sit in the dark and cry.
Are you an abstract manifestation of my childhood traumas and recent memories combined? 'Cause damn, you look like you came out of a dream!
Butcher knives are great tools for cutting many things!
Fruit, vegetables, my arms.
Me and rose bushes have something in common: mangled, can hurt, red, and people only like one part.
Wow, he stole my antidepressant toy. The next day, he was on the ground.
When your mom says it will all be ok if you just......... *there is blood on the floor*
D.A.R.E. Lion Mascot: Don't take drugs kids!
Me: My therapist says I need those to live.
D.A.R.E. Lion Mascot: _escorts to school counselor_
What do you call a failure in another language?
Me.
1273. My mother does not love me, nor does anyone, and my family doesn't either.
Person: What's your perfect date look like?
Me: Oh, just hanging around in a tree.
What do you (anyone) and a joke not have in common?
Jokes have meanings.